Man w/o the words

2008-08-04T09:30:00.001-07:00

I've MOVED.

Or am in the process of moving.

hahahaha

2008-07-31T11:55:00.000-07:00

Some snippets of my life, or life thereof, which I learnt on this long and winding journey.

- lust is smth a guy will get stuck with for his whole life and it makes me wanna say wth sometimes lol

- cant get rid of it, but can control it. =)

- No temptation can seize me beyond what I can bear.

- Be more alert and watch where ur eyes are going lar

- My mind is like a battlefield, with the conscience/God's voice squaring off against the negative/wrong tots

- Refoucs on smth else lor.

- God doesn't need us, we need Him

- Why say "I think, I guess, maybe, should be" when I can say "Yes or No" lol

- "Yes", stop comtemplating and go. "No", stop comtemplating and go home

- Be convicted of what you're doing. If not, why do?

- Be appreciative of what you have. Not grumbling.

- I'm soooo not gonna do well for exams unless I buck up. lol.

That's all. For now.

2008-07-28T07:30:00.000-07:00

How and where should I start.... hmm. CLC?

Well, it was more than just theory teaching. It was an impartation of spirit, passing down of skills. Though it's only 4 lessons so far, I did bring back something with me. Actually, not only smth, but quite alot. hahah.

The MCG was a success. PTL. Even though I didn't warm up or cool down, and suffered a slight flu in the process, it went well. Bad for my body, but at least I hit some objectives which I set. lol.

Was thinking back bout how things were at the start, and how things are going now. Really, thank God for pulling me thru those tough times. Of how I used to be. Now, I wont say I'm perfect, or near where I hope I would be, but I'm slowing moving towards there.

As I hear what others comment and feedback, I'm really appreciative of what I have. really.

2008-07-24T09:58:00.000-07:00

Haven't been blogging for some time now. Guess my life is too boring? Haha. Actually, it is bah. Nowadays, I find tt I've less to blog about. Cos there's nothing new.

First of all, attitude change. Haha. I'm going thru this phrase, called attitude change. Not only a change in attitude, but a change in the way I look at things, at ppl, at situation.

Also, heart change. Old habits die hard. No doubt bout it. 3 days to pick up bad habits, 3 years to break it. Well, not literally 3 years. But the meaning is there. You cant teach an old dog new tricks, but neither can u make an old dog forgot an old trick. lol. Yea, but I'm not a dog.hahahahha.

For those who's feeling down, here's smth for thought.

Job suffered with sores all over his body. He lost everything overnight, from his wealth to his family. Then he had his best friends came and accuse him of wrongdoing. And all for, doing nothing wrong! lol. But guess wad? This dude said, "Shall we accept Good from god and not trouble?"

Paul suffered in prison. Was shipwrecked. In chains. Beaten. And there's a thorn in his flesh. Cld refer 2 being tormented mentally or the rumoured blindness in his eyes. 3 times he prayed 2 get the thorn away, but there's just, "My grace is sufficient. For my power is made perfect in your weakness." And guess what, he decided 2 boast more abt his weakness. lol.

So yea. If u think life is hopeless, think bout these 2 ppl =)

2008-07-20T08:27:00.000-07:00

Today tried something new. Admin work. Or a taste of it. Was helping Dennis Loh with the admin work for Membership today, by doing registration. Tell you. It's nt as easy as it looks.

First, there were basically 2 divisions. One was me. Pretty one man show. Dennis came and helped. If not I confirm die. The second division were the 2 Filipino sisters. So those Filipinos go to thier division, while there Adults n Tertiary ppl come 2 me 2 register, as well as stress me. Lol.

Why? Btw, not grumbling. Just some after thoughts. And feedback

First of all. I was one guy doing it.

Second, 3pm start right? Ppl start streaming in at around aft 245pm. Then they stream in with their CG. So most of the times, have 2 do registration for 3-5 ppl at one go.

Third, alot of them came and didnt have name on list @_@ I couldnt really attend to them. Thank God for Dennis who did most of this kinda work.

Fourth, while I was trying 2 do, some bunch of ppl played "Low" by Flo-Rida. Distracting man.

But thank God, it went pretty well.

Then came the amazing part. Counting the money. Imagine if there were 100+ ppl, and most gave 10 dollars note. So I handled around 1k+ of money today. And during the recount, the first count which I did was 30 dollars short. Thank God it's ok at the end :D

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

2008-07-18T12:13:00.000-07:00

MLOCT test is done. And as usual, it's stupid. Waste of time. No brainer. Common sense. Whatever explictive u wanna call it. Careless mistake here n there, but shld be alright.

Distractions, temptations are everywhere. Lol. Man. God need not lead me into any of this. I can find it myself. Hahahaha. But weeding it out would be an important thing to do, top priority.

I need to guard my heart.

I need 2 guard my mind.

I need to know clearly what's my input.

I need to calm myself down sometimes.

Where are you?
I need you
Don’t leave me here on my own
Speak to me
Be near me
I can’t survive unless I know you’re with me

Yes, I'm listening to something more on the emotional side, but I'm not emo. lol

2008-07-16T09:33:00.000-07:00

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's going to hurt when it heals too
Oh yeah (It'll All get better in time)

No, I'm nt emo. Just that this is a nice song. Hahaha. And some things, do get better in time. =D

I'm scared. I'm fearful. But I know, perfect love drives out all fear.

I'm weak, but when I'm weak, then I'm strong. Oxymoron?

It's a thorn in my flesh, really. But your grace is sufficient.

Cos I know the truth, and the truth will set me free.

It took a bigger chunk outta me that I thought. It really did. But I'm glad. No, that's too mild. I'm delighted. ^^

And I feel this way. Because I dont want to be stuck at the same place. I want a breakthru dammit.

Because I'm a guy.

ooo. I just complimented a certin ms CSW that she looked different, and she tot I was saying she looked ugly. hahahahah. So insecure. Of cos not. It's a compliment. Look nicer.

But I don’t care what they say
I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don’t know the truth

2008-07-13T11:24:00.000-07:00

To all the ppl who wanted a ballon today, but didnt receive, felt like I have 2 explain 2 u all why.

First, we booked the place. IT'S NT OURS. We return the place to them as good as it came, or even better.

Second, if I gave u all, others will request for it. Then will become a circus act. Professionalism gone.

Third, IT IS VERY DISTRACTING. Lol. Esp during pre H20-bap in the Ballroom.

Yes, I wanted to give one away. But aft some advice, decided not to. Sorry. My bad. Hahahaha. =)

2008-07-13T08:46:00.000-07:00

Quite a number of events happened this few days. Lol. But first of all, I FINISHED MY ACCOUNTS PROJECT. Done my part like on, Sat morn/afternoon. Well, nt just by my own effort, but lots of credit goes to my project mate, Rabiah. =)

Sat was svc, was not only serving on stage, but was also teaching ppl how 2 do Holy Comm. My first time teaching. Hope I explained it correctly. Hahaha. But, this time, on stage, I think I grasp better how to do the things, and how it flows etc;

And someone affirmed how I performed and my dressing. And, well, from what this person says, he said I did the stuff alot better. Thanks alot Cedric. Hahahah. I still rmb, 2 years ago, someone commented that I looked very sloppy and like some Xiao Di Di. LOL. XD, but just last Sat, there were feedback that we dressed well blah blah. It's really..... erm, good. Let's keep it up yea?

Sunday. Was serving for H20 bap. Was writing cards for the 5 ppl. Well, I only wrote 3, cos of not enough cards n no time to grab more. I own the both of u one =), literally. Also, I sprayed my cologne for one card. Well, I sprayed it aft I wrote the card, so it smudged =_=

Rewrote it, but this time I sprayed twice before writing. It's nt some cheapo ass <$20 perfume k? It has a brand, and a nice smell. Take that. Lol.

WE NEED A BIGGER SPACE FOR H20 BAP. The ballroom cant contain us anymore, which is a GOOD SIGN. Lol. It overflows. Was encouraged to see an old uncle get off from his wheelchair. Really encouraged. And YEA. GOOD WEATHER. NO RAIN. lol

Before that, my Floor Manager asked me where I was gg aft I grad, and if I have any tots of being a Team Leader.... .... ....

OF COS I DO. Lol. But, there's certain things. Like, I join this ministry actually, w/o a vision or much of a reason, just wanting to smile at ppl. (For those I said tt got ppl feedback I looked good, that's nt really a pull factor lol)Isit really alright, hahahahah. I'm willing to serve, just that Spirit of Excellence is lacking, and I tend to swicth off sometimes (lose focus)

Hahahha. Well, I guess, losing focus is smth to work on also. I guess, it's impt to keep focus as well as recovering back aft I switch off. Lol.

Ah well, it's nt confirmed or anything. Lol. Just concentrate on growing myself bah. =)

2008-07-11T11:27:00.000-07:00

Ok, I just got hit by the fact that there's a project due next Monday, which I haven't really started on. Oh man, procrastination. lol. Guys are plain lazy, but doesn't mean I have to be. Ah well.

I really need to be more organised. There's this incident, when I borrowed some notes from my frens cos I lazy 2 print it out. Then, few days l8r, when I returned the notes back, man, it was half crumpled. zZz. When I returned it, almost felt like digging a hole and hide my face inside. Hahahah. Well, next time must have a file. Well, having a file doesn't mean I'm more organised, but... it's a start. lol.

There's alot of things to be done, alot for me to grow in. But I guess, slowly 1 by 1 lor. If list out all at the same time, then not say very effective. Go and zoom into one area at a time or so bah. =)

2008-07-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

Today, smth interesting happened. Cos nita go Supreme Court visit. Then, as I put my bag thru the X-ray scanner, the guard stopped me. Apparently I was carring smth potentially dangerous inside. Then, when the guard mentioned "cutting plier", I was, erm, abit stunned.

Yea, in the end, it was found. Lol. My bag did have a pair of pliers. Then got 3 policeman come n see see. Shit sia. Could have been kena charge for carrying dangerous weapon sia. I mean, if penknife or scissors still reasonable la. But, what the hell wld a pair of pliers be doing with a student? Lol. Thank God they just kept it at the counter.

Lesson to be learnt: Be more organised and neat la. My own bag that I carry around almost everywhere. lol.

Family: A group which possesses and implements an irrational commitment to the well-being of it's members.

Irrational commitment.

Irrational.

2008-07-08T08:50:00.000-07:00

Here's some food for thought. To every1 reading, no1 in particular.

Love your neighbour as yourself.

Now, on first instance, it's said to be wanting what's best for the ppl around us, etc; it's not wrong, and it's the thing we're commanded to do. However, here's the catch. The second part, as yourself. Now, if we cant even love ourselves, how do we love others? If we dont even desire the best of ourselves, how do we desire the best for others?

Loving ourselves doesn't mean we become some self-centered bitch, but it generally means that we shouldn't have low self-esteem. I'm nt a very talented person, but I dont look down on myself. I mean, what's the point? Lol.

Anw, I found my secondary school stuff required for my Apel portfolio. I got everything ready save for my academic transcript. Tml go print out can liao. And done. No 4.1 lol

Thinking deeper. It's impt to think deep. Cos, things aren't only on the surface only. I'm still trying to think more, instead of having others spoonfeed me the answers. Sorta like a trouble-shooting session. Think think think...

2008-07-07T09:07:00.000-07:00

Some1 has to reply me thru email. Lol. Damn amusing. 1-3 more days. Hang in there yea? And rmb to share what happened thruout those time. Lol.

Ytd night, my cuz asked me to go Gay Club. Oops. I mean, Play Club. Well, no diff anyway. Since Play is for gays, or so I heard. Wont make a judgment on it, since I never been there before. I dont think I'll be caught dead in there. The whole, or close to the whole stretch, is the same.

And, contary to public opinion, it's not my cuppa tea. Got school the next day also. The days of Youth Day are long over. Preparing for sch and the week ahead is more impt.

This blog's getting a lil dead. Cos I've no idea what to blog about. Writer's block. But well, all I can say is, I'm thinking hard of what 2 write la. But topics will run out sooner or later what. lol.

Thinking of ways to not make this an event-only blog. But smth, different? lol. Ok, mayb not that. Cos got more impt things to think abt other than this blog as well as a new blogskin. lol.

But, to end this post off. Sometimes, it's impt to know the impact of our actions. Like, when we do smth, it not only affects us, it affects the ppl around us. Not pointing the finger at any1, but think bout it. If you're in class one day and some1 starts 2 yawn beside u, surely you'll feel sleepy?

I'm nt sure how that happened. But it's still etched in my mind. Lol. Cant get it out. It's a lesson bout self-control. Though the other party(ies) involved prolly arent as affected, but still, it's kinda of a funny experience come 2 think bout it.

2008-07-05T11:51:00.000-07:00

OMG. I saw Jessica working at Ben and Jerry's. But cant take free ice cream, cos of her manager or smth. lol. Ah well. Another time then. XD

Hahahaha. Someone's fasting from MSN. So wont be seeing this person online anytime soon. But I believe it's for a greater cause yea? Jiayou jiayou ^^

There's gonna be a Court visit next Wednesday. Either Supreme or Subordinate Court. Which ever it is, it's gonna be quite zzz. Since it's nt sitting into a trial or anyth, just go there and see the Court Technology. Hope I do grasp smth. Best part, I gotta make my own way there. lol.

I realised one thing. I need wisdom. LOADS of it. Certain situations can be handled better. I should have thought faster, on my feet. Think deeper, like, 5W 1H, smth like that? It's part of a prcoess. But has to be done. One way or another. There's more that meets the eye.

Reading this book, Everybody's Normall Till You Get to Know Them. Some food for thought.

- Authentic Community always involve Spiritual Growth.

So yea, how can I contribute to this aspect? =)

2008-07-03T11:14:00.000-07:00

Today was quite an eventful day. Met up with Joycelyn at Tanjong Pagar. Walked around awhile, and we tried the Mango juice thing at Amora Hotel. It's damn nice. I'm putting my money where my mouth is. The mango is freshly blended, and it's just ripe. Then blended with ice. It cost around $3.30 per cup, but it's damn nice. There's one outlet at Bugis Junction. MUST TRY. lol.

Writer's block. Lol. Never really happened 2 me before. Maybe cos I used 2 be the gung-ho blogger, just write what I want inside. Haha.

Ah well. 1 good idea is to go and reflect upon my day. Maybe upon the past few days. On whether I could have handled something better. Or maybe I did something which I shouldn't have done. (Not what you're thinking of man)

Always Be My Baby - David Cook

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you, indefinitely
Girl, don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling, 'cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way, you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling, 'cause you'll always be my baby

Man. love this song. Lol

2008-06-30T11:50:00.000-07:00

I passed CIV PRO. WOOTS! Like, only 41/98 ppl passed it la, and I did. Shiok la. Lol. Though I didnt do as well as I hoped I would, a pass is a pass. =)

Then, I was supposed 2 hand in my Civ Pro files today also. Guess wad? I didnt check my TP mail. Lol. Like wth sia. But thank God, mr seong gave me an extension. Hahahha.

My brother's hooked onto Hell's Kitchen. It's kinda amusing hearing Chef Gordon screaming and swearing over food being either overcooked or undercooked, or being too slow. And he's damn sarcastic. But that's the amusing part.

Ok, shocking stuff. I'm gonna bitch less now. Lol. Cos one of my frens is bemused that I MSN her at 2am to ask her to dig up the dirt on sum1. Lol. No particular purpose, just to disturb only.

At the end of the HPL season, Pikachu finished FIRST from bottom, with a glorious point count of 1, and zero victories. BUT, we enjoyed ourselves. We got a hara-juku.(spelling), and we built stronger friendships, and of cos, we're all aware of what needs to be improved. Lol.

And also, I'm gonna memorize a verse everyday. To use in my walk everyday, as well as in situations when I need to. Take that Natas. Hah!

Ok, there's ALOT of random stuff. Lol. Maybe cos my life havent really had anyth interesting. Ah well. Haha.

2008-06-29T11:07:00.000-07:00

Hahaha. My insecurity made me do smth stupid. Thank God it cld be rectified. If not cham liao. =)

Today's final match was great. We lost 6-1. But it's a very good effort. It used to be 12-0, and we were 6-0 down by half time. Now it's just 2-0 down by half time. Lol. The first goal was my bad. Won't elaborate much on it.

Sat experienced a few things that's unprecedented. How to handle certain new situations. As well as finding out more random stuff bout Nexus.

I'm thinking of why I joined as an usher as I was asked why I wanted to join in the first place. Hmm...

Anw, my 2nd time on stage. Full of errors! Lol. First of all, the chair was supposed 2 be there as I serve holy comm. But I forgot 2 take it up.... then aft tt, gotta rush up and put the chair n water there before Ps Simon goes up. Lol.

But I guess, it's cool.

2008-06-27T11:25:00.000-07:00

Less than 48 hours left to our final match against FC 2024, and looking at the current standings, well.

This whole season have been an enriching experience for me. From ppl coming down to support, even though it's pretty obvious that we would lose, to the great time I had playing with the bunch of guys, it's priceless. It's like, I would rather have fun and lose than win and scream at each other. Having said tt, it's not like I dont have the desire to gain a victory. Hahahaha.

My first foray into playing at field level was really an eye opener. But I didnt regret it at all. Hahaha. I learnt alot. Seriously. Season 2 arh Season 2. Until then, a few friendlies here n there won't hurt, would it?

Last match against FC2024, our last hurrah. Hahah. Let's go out n enjoy ourselves. =)
Until then.

Man 2 watch: Their legendary number 8

Tall, big, mobile, intelligent and much more. Definatly a threat from set-pieces. Have proven himself by scoring 13/14 in 8. Think he'll be looking at 20 in 9 after playing us. Hahahah

2008-06-26T11:24:00.000-07:00

Ok, so while I was talking 2 David, happened 2 chance on some lame quiz. And so, we were sharing what we wanted in our spouse next time. And so, here's what I'm looking out for:

1) Able to sayang me.

Duh. When I'm down, make me feel loved.

2) Able to stand my bitching

Hell. I bitch, whine, complain abt stuffs alot. Must be able to take it.

3) Presentable 2 frens.

Self-explainatory.

4) Let me have the TV

Next time, when Liverpool have a match shown live, it should be the ONLY thing that's on the TV. Not so junk soap opera.

HAHHAHA. Of cos not la. Well, I did say this out of jest before. And some1 once commented that I sound like I'm looking out for a guy! lol. XD. Wont say who that some1 is tho. =)

Ok, aft some careful thought, I came out with these few? Tho I think it'll chanhe over time, so reader's discretion advised. And yea, I'm sure it'll change for the better as I grow in God =)

1) Sharing the same vision

Sounds damn textbook, but it's true. I mean, it's like, 2 ppl with different vision will find it hard 2 serve tgt, smth like oil and water, Liverpool n Man "Scum" Utd?
So yea.

2) Supportive of what I do if it's right

Let's say, I pop out the qns that I wanna uproot and go some shitass country for mission, I already have the ans myself. All I'm looking for is some support. So yea.

Or mayb there's a sure lose match up ahead, but still come n support. That's will be shiok.

3) Able to challenge each other

Guys are plain lazy. If you havent got this fact, get it right now. Haha. Some1 who can challenge me not to be so lazy and attempt to do greater things, that'll be good.

4) Love

I'm nt ez 2 love, nor am I very loving. Trying 2 grow in that. SOme1 who can challenge the both of it wld be good.

5) Able to share stuff with

Open communication. No walls. Share deep and random stuff. Lol.

6) Most impt, love God n place God above all else.

Even me, yes.

The rest are optional.

1) Liverpool fan. HAHHAA. YNWA =)

2) Can cook.

3) Able to do housework and do my laundry. LOL.

These can change, but as I honour God, I'm sure God will give me sum1, that will blow me away =))

2008-06-24T11:33:00.000-07:00

Today, supposed 2 go for dinner before Jacob's place. But heck, suffered from super indigestion. Was like, feeling super bloated with an acute pain. And SM n ZY was with me. I was whining like hell, cos damn pain, and I cant have my dinner aft tt. Thank God for Eno, which they recommended me. INSTANT RELIEVE SIA. I SOOMPA. Shiok. But I didnt have dinner. Suppered with Karen n Vivian at Drive 6 there instead. =)

Since SM, or Ser Meng or George Yeo helped me with Eno, I decided 2 do the stupid quiz too. Lol. Since I've no tagboard for ppl 2 tag me XD

A.) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B.) Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

C.) Have FUN!

#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Feel damn sad, and have anger fantasies of me beating up the both of them. LOL. But in all cases, feel sad. Then would wish for both of them 2 crash n burn. Suffer bad. But get over it in the end.

#2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
Beat 2024 12-0. Lol. No la. To see ppl around me being saved, and to go for a long term mission somewhere far away =)

#3. What will your dream wedding be like?
Somewhere quiet, n low-key.

#4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
Nope. Read previous post. Believe, trust, n have faith in His plan

#5. Do you like cheese ?
It's the sex.

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
Loving some1

#7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
Until I realise tt it's stupid 2 give up the whole forest for a tree. Lol.

#8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Feel damn sad. Bitch bout it. Be emo. Then move on. Lol. Whole Forest > 1 Tree

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Discontented, yes. Unhappy, no.

#10. What is the most heart breaking moment for you so far?
When I realise my best fren wasn't really that best aft all.

#11. How do you see yourself in ten years time?
BIG ASS LAWYER. Lol. Not really. But still loving God n ppl wherever I am. Also impt, being faithful to what I'm called to do.

#12. Who are currently the most important people to you?
Him, family, Shep n CG, Unit, TP, frens around me, Pikachu Utd ^^\/

#13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
He didnt exactly tagged, but wont mind if I did this. That guy looks like George Yeo, and is a loving bro. =)

#14. Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?
Married but poor. Cliche, but money cant buy you happiness. Even if u got loads of $$, but no1 or no purpose to spend on, the point being?

#15. What is the first thing you do every morning?
Drag myself out of bed, and start to praise for the day ahead.

#16. Would you give all in a relationship?
Yes I would. Even my family think I would. No kidding. They used 2 think tt my feelings being cheated by a girl is as ez as a snowball melting in Hell.

#17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
These 2 ppl wld prolly appeal to the 2 sides of me, which is the playful n outgoing or the settled n serious. But I guess, the settled n serious one.

#18. What type of friends do you like?
No preference really. But mainly those who can joke n share deep stuff with at the same time.

2008-06-22T10:47:00.000-07:00

Abit random... but here goes. In case some of you don't know, I'm supposed to secure my own place for attachment. And so I written to some of my dream firms, but I didnt get no reply, except for UBS which was a waste of time.

So, in desperation, I wrote to many firms. Still, no confirmation. And so I was feeling kinda sian, cos school restarting soon, and the fact is, I ain't got the time to go down interview. Matters weren't helped when my fren got a reply faster than me. He got a place in another firm within 2 days of writing, compared 2 my two weeks.

So I made a prayer. And so, I checked my junk mail. Dont ask me why. I haven't checked my junk mail in like.... years. I mean, who actually checks their junk mail regularly? But guess what, I got a confirmation for a place. 2 amazing things.

1) It was my dream firm, $800 per month. Most of my course ppl get $440. I know of one guy who gets $3 per day. LOL XD

2) I didnt even have 2 go down for an interview. They just offered me based on my resume n cover letter.

Isint it amazing? I not only get a place, I got what I wanted. Wow. Wow. Wow. =)))

Edited:

It's abit crazy, but Evolution trashed Northeast 14-0. By 14 goals u know? That's like, one goal every 7 mins? Like anyhow shoot also score one. Lol. Means, we're not tt bad actually. The worst we lost was 12-0, and that's like long, long ago. Now shld be 6-8 la. LOL. The epitome of Total Football, shown today live. =)

I just heard tt my buddy is going off for the upcoming LC. Feeling abit down that I'm nt going, which is compounded by the fact that:

- It's a once in a lifetime chance

- I'm stuck in Singapore

- I'm stuck in attachment

- I cant go for Missions either

- Miss 1 day of attachment will grant me 1 week of no pay work.

But still, I'm nt complaining. In fact, I rejoice. Take my word for it.

I believe, I know, and I trust that there is a Plan and Reason that I'm gonna be here, and I believe with ALL my heart that it works for the good of me =))

2008-06-18T10:44:00.000-07:00

Haha. On tues, met up with my cousin Kuan and we went out tgt. And so tgt, we went MOS with a few of his friends. And turns out, it was an underage party. =_= Not that I've anyth against it, just that I'm above 18 and the thrill of going to an underage party is redundant when I can go in on a normal day.

The dance floor was super packed. Really alot of ppl. So I was dancing with them, and I was asked to stand behind one of the girls to protect her from being grind. At the end, one of his friends said that I looked like I was grinding the girl for the whole night and if I want her number or not. LOL. But nah, I wasn't and I didnt take the number.

But something I realised. When the R&B hits, like I Don't Wanna Know or Apologize plays, I immediatly like lose myself and just started dancing. It's amazing how such hits could make me like, siao. Music is not by us, it's from Above. And it's ingrained in our souls. Trust me.

And if the sounds of MOS can make me dance n sing alon. The Name of the Great I AM. How much more should I be singing and dancing to it? And I tried to translate that energy into today's praise. I'm nt sure bout the rest, but I had a good time dancing and singing. How bout you? ^^ \/

2008-06-16T22:03:00.000-07:00

Is there an easier way to earn money? Lol. I've won erm, 18 bucks? Just from these 2 tickets, which is 3 hours of work from my previous job, which gave $6 per hour. Lol.

This is Croatia and Germany to win by Full Time, $5 can get back $15.50.

This is, Croatia to win by Full Time, $5 bet can get back $12.50

But, come to think of it, am I happy to win? Of cos I am. Who wouldn't? But am I proud of it? Nah. I just this is just a random flutter, don't think I'll punt again for this tournament.

Lol, tho my track record has been pretty good. I think it shld be in my Octobert/November archieves, I won $22.50 from a $5 bet and I treat my ex-CG to ice-cream, while during Russia vs England, I punted on a Russia win, and though I cringed on my sofa as I watched my TV heroes crash out, my wallet got $15 bucks fatter. ^^

As this money comes, I'll think of how 2 spend it wisely. Whenever I won smth thru punting, I wld have the tendacy to bless others as.... erm, this money is not really my money? As in, I worked nothing for it. Lol. So now is see how lor.

2008-06-14T10:59:00.000-07:00

Another day passed. Still nothing, NOTHING, NOTHING. Things not supposed to work that way, you know? Things don't work that way. Why do we still have nothing, zero, nuts, blank, empty????

I feel glad that other ppl have harvests, really, take my word for it. It's just that, why can't we too? I find it hard to put a smile on my face. To see others smile. I know I rejoice not because of results, but trusting.

It's tiring, discouraging, but at the same time, I feel like doing more. Like there's more to be done. Shouldn't just stop here, nor base it on this once-off thing. I know I'll run into a wall more than once for the next few times, but I can't slow down now, can't slow down never.

It's like a match. You need goals, you miss a good oppotunity. Doesn't mean you stop there and stop trying. But rather, try harder and the goal will come.

I just wonder why, must we really wait that long? Or just that, it's right in front of us, but we don't sow hard enough? I really hope we dont miss out again. REALLY. F*** all the tots of quitting, giving up, doing smth else right now. Because there's a window of time for this lifestation, let's not waste it alright? Dont wait until every1 becomes old and then it'll be too costly to replace, like a certain AC Milan.

And now, it's the time when I enjoy not having a tagboard. I know aft seeing this, someone may tag smth of encouragement or smth. But really, there's no need to. Any comments, just MSN me or smth. Appreciate it anyways <3

2008-06-11T10:15:00.000-07:00

Wow. Today was quite a special day. Fatigue. Cos I didnt really have much sleep for the past few days. Nope, not cos I was emo-ing or cos I have sleep disorders. Just that Euro fever caught up with me. Go Portugal ~.~

Today was a even more special day, well, at least for me. I recived a challenge to go down evax alone, with the possibility of doing it alone. Well, in the end, I did. Haha. Evax-ed from 2.20-5.30pm like that? Got a few contacts. Cool. It was a pretty scary experience, but hey, it's a good one. Many thanks to Da Amanda for sacrificing her lunch time to evax with me. Greatly appreciate it.

Well, instead of rotting at home, why not go down n try? God might just show mercy on me and bless me. I nvr know. ^^

Then got CG. Well, smth funny happened then. But won't say what. Lol. Just a big sorry yea?

Portugal, Portugal, Portugal.

Friday Friday Friday

ESS ESS ESS

2008-06-09T05:41:00.000-07:00

Going to UBS for interview tml =)

It's funny, how I addressed the interviewer as a Sir for a few exchanges, before the person actually emailed me back that she's a female =_= Haha. Hope I dont screw up the interview, though I feel that alot of ppl would want be vying for UBS, 800 bucks per month leh.

Ah well. I've written to 7-8 prospective employers, and only 2 replied. The other one is from CASE, the watchdog tt protects consumer rights in Spore.

Praying for ESS as well as tml, UBS *fingers crossed*

Interview:

Well, I was supposed to have interview at 10am, however, I reached there at 9.40am, and it was over by 9.50am. Lol. They asked that standard few questions, like intro urself, any questions..

But the icing on the cake was, why u wanna work for us. OF COS I WANT TO LA. Why not sia? Lol. It's freaking UBS!

So aft tt, saw Darren doing his carpark attendant thingy at Suntec too, then went to sch for evax. Had a few contacts, nita msg soon. Soccer aft tt wif Wei Kit. Had some fun, then home.

2008-06-07T13:51:00.000-07:00

Today's P&W was pretty good. We managed 2 get a few Filipino brothers n sisters to lead for us. Haha. Well, I guess it was ministering, it was pretty good too. =)

Aft svc went Le Meridian n eat. Had the Fish n Chips. That 1, I spammed the salt until it's like free one. Lol. I guess I eaten a few chunks of salt. Bleah. Fasting from the western food for the next 3-4 weeks.

Went out with Azri one last time before his slavery. Lol. Goodbye bro, miss yah, miss your hair. HAHHAHAHA

2008-06-06T02:29:00.000-07:00

Oh yea. Exams are over. Woot! Now is time for a 2 week break, as well as a writing my resume n cover letter for SIP, as well as sending it out asap. Preferbably by tonight. Lol. I'm kinda excited as to where I can go, preferbably to UBS or SGX.

Also, still gotta clear MLOCT, as well as go to Jacob's place. Hope they reply me soon. *keeping my fingers crossed*

2008-06-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

Today was CYL2, and I guess it was pretty good, altho not as physical at CYL, it was still quite a test of my mettle. Rolling in ketchup, sand and oil, it was pretty erm... new for me. Hahaha.

I did enjoy myself, and I hope the whole team did. But I guess my competitive streak got a better of me? I had the desire to be like, the "star player" of each game, but yea, I realised and let others have the chance. I guess, sometimes it's good to fade into the background instead of trying to be in front all the time.

Aft tt, was the Tug-O-War. Way to go Team 4. Gave it ur best effort. =)

Then, during the Tug-O-War, Da Amanda was throwing sand at me. So I threw sand back, into her hair.(The best way to stop ppl from throwing at ur face n body). Then aft that she threw sand into my hair. Then not long aft, her younger sis ask me wanna play or not, and started throwing sand =____= Did the same thing, and into her hair and vice-versa. Later, took 15 freaking mins to actually scrap my hair free from sand. Lol.

It's come to my realisation, that ppl will always say I look more handsome aft a hair cut. So why dont every1 come 2 a consensus, and say that "Suquan's handsome all the time." Lol. Save the trouble.

Hahaha. Aft dinner n stuff, took MRT home with Lancaster n Xiao Ying. And had a great laugh on my way home, esp with the "It's all in the mind", and about personal space. Lol

Monday.

Explore the cave that is my chest. A torch reveals there's nothing left

Woke up today feeling very lethargic. Pretty much cause I was studying till 1 plus in the morning. And so, I was gonna be late for awhile. Was supposed to meet Alia n Su Wei. Then Su Wei msg me, ask me where I am. And so I took a cab down to school. WAH. Kena cheated. I tot peak hour 9am end, in the end it ends at 930am. =__= And I took the cab at 9.18am. Sian. But when I reach sch, I realised that she still's at home.

The voice of who I used to be, Screaming out, "Someone, someone please"

Hahahaha. But it's ok bah. Go study with the rest of the peeps like Don n Haiqal. Then Alia came, and soon others followed. Haha. Su Wei came latest, and so she asked me how to do certain stuffs. And so I taught.

Please shine a light into the black. Wade through the depths and bring me back"

The paper was pretty easy. I guess it was quite do-able. Hahaha. Not gonna do so well, but don't think I'll fail also. Hahaha. And what I taught Su Wei came out, so for that part shld be able to score.

I need you, like you would not believe

Went to eat and hung out at Starbucks with Alia n Kris. Had a good time of laughter and talking =) Ice passion tea. Wow. Damn nice.

When my hopes seem to dangle somewhere just beyond my reach

Aft tt, went to watch Spore play Uzbekistan with my bro. It wasn't exactly a full house, but still, quite a number of ppl. Well. Spore didnt play badly. Just that Uzbekistan was in a different league from us, literally. And we got pwned. Lol. But I enjoyed myself with my bro.

You say you've heard my prayers, you've read my words there on the beach

2008-05-31T09:12:00.000-07:00

Friday was my Civ Pro test. Was easier than I thought. Dont think I'll do well tho. A pass would suffice.

Sat was helping Si Hua celebrate her birthday. While it wasn't really her birthday, we pushed forward here celebration cos the week of her bday we wont be serving. Well, everything was done pretty last min, but we still managed to pull it thru, thanks 2 the help of Team 1 and my co-planner, Grace.

Tho some sacrifices had to be made? Or mayb wrong priorities. Cos we skipped sermon to touch up on the card. Cant do both tgt, so no choice, do the card.

Grace's impression of Elmo on the back of the card. Well, it was pretty well done actually. Just that mayb the body was abit.... distorted? Lol. But still a nice effort.

Me and Si Hua aft everything. Hahaha. I guess she was pretty touched. And she was going like, "Wah you're so sweet, I can't believe you're such a sweet guy", and "You just gained 2 levels in my opinion" LOL

I always tot that in Poly, most of the friends we make a superficial, and that, aft we knock off from sch, these friends dont exist anymore. So I'm suprised when Alia said that she thinks I'm a nice guy even tho she dont know me that well, and that she hopes for the best for me =))

I'm really touched. Hahaha. Thanks. But I think the way things are right now, it ain't half bad.

2008-05-29T07:05:00.000-07:00

You were there for summer dreaming
And you are a friend indeed
And I hope you find your freedom
Eventually
For eternity

Robbie Williams. =)

Term test is almost coming, and well, all I can say is, God help me. Lol. Shit man. I barely know what's going on. Actually, I do. Just that I scared not enough time to cramp everything in.

Had shepherding with my handsome man sheep. Had a great time of talking and discussion. Went for lessons which is a waste of time. They taught you how 2 conduct interviews. zZz.

Wed was CG, hope I led well. The thing is this, I can never critique what I'm leading, not say never, but I would find it hard too. Unless it's TERRIBLY bad or good. LOL. Headed to Prata for dinner.

Stayed up for the England match. Thanks to my bro David for chatting till the macth started. And, it was a WASTE OF TIME. Well, at least the first half was. Gerrard on the left. Haha. Nice try. England are still a long-ball team. They'll never win the World Cup with long, direct balls, nor would they win if they continue to field Frank Lampard. Went to sleep after that and woke up.

Thurs had Accounting tut, and more of I dont really know what's going on, but I managed to pick up. It's just a continuation of what I've been learning so far. Balance sheet, Cash flow statement etc;

After that, had shepherding wif milady shepherd. Had a great time of sharing and learning.

Soon after, when to find several people to study, those who are smarter. Lol. Go and listen to them discuss questions and hope to be able to catch one or two things. But I also managed to study some of my own.

Borrowed CDs from the library(again). They've a great archive there. Lol. I shld stop soon, awfully suspicious for someone to be borrowing CDs for 4 days running.

2008-05-27T06:49:00.000-07:00

I finished my resume for SIP liao, now what is lacking is the cover letter. And everything would be done.

Haha. The resume. It's like... an alarm clock is close to ringing now. My time in poly is almost up. Aft I finished it, I realised that my window of time is almost over? Hahaha. SIP would prolly eat into most of whatever time I've left.

Here in TP, I guess this would be the last time there's ppl to do things tgt with? As in, maybe when I evax, there'll be other ppl evaxing also. The crowd in there. But not aft this. It's more of an independant thing? You want do then do? If not, too bad.

No idea where I'll end up after this, going to Adults or to NS group. Hahaha. But wherever it is, I believe that it's the best for me. It's not thinking too much, I'm already a quarter into my Year 3. Soon, I'll grad. (I hope)

Having said that, doesnt mean that I'll slack and not give my best now. So don't worry nor assume so much.

And many thanks to David for listening to me bitch abt this. XD

2008-05-25T08:22:00.000-07:00

My baby bolster. With me for as long as I can rmb. Check out my bedsheet. ^^ I sleep and breathe Pikachu United. LOL. \o/

Yea. Instead of sleeping on the sofa, I slept on the floor in my study room. Cos got aircon. Lol. Woke up at 11am today. Read abit, then washed up and went for the match liao.

Met Jolene at Eunos MRT then go Parkway Parade. Randall was contemplating coming along, but due to some reasons(cos got direct bus), so didn't. Reached Parkway Parade and had LJS for lunch. Then headed over to TKSS.

For one, TKSS was behind TKGS. And we had to walk one big round. Good tactic of theirs. Make us tired and sian from all the walking. Hahaha.

When I reached there, I realised FC Anonymous wasn't really Anonymous. Anonymous meant something like unknown. And there were at least 3-4 church staff inside. Lol. What Anonymous sia. Shld call FC Hope Office Staff. Or mayb FC Family United. Cos they have jerseys, and their spouse/partner have jerseys of the team too. Lol.

There's this guy, Ah Long. Adult Wam dude. Saw his name before. Tan Ah Long. Haha. He came down tgt with his wife and 2 kids. And he was kicking a small plastic ball around with his kid that could walk. So much for warm-up eh? Hahahaha

But I think it's pretty cool. He could teach his kids

a) the ways of the Lord
b) the ways of P&W
and now
c) the ways of being a striker

Be proud of ur dad kids. He did pretty well. Was overshadowed by his team mates, but he's still pretty good. Lol.

And they're different. They saw our keeper had no gloves, they provided an extra pair for us. Church Office staff. Dont know ur name. But thanks =)

We lost like, 8 or 9 to 1? Lol. Even the ref lost count. But it's a good game nonetheless. And many thanks to Mag, Chia Min, Pei Xin, Jolene, Randall, Nic for coming down 2 support too ^^

Sorry guys for being such an asshole today. Esp 2 KC. Lol. Cos I was put into the Left Back position today, then I purposely didnt want to play as a Center Back cos it's ok to overlap and support as a Left Back. It's a team game. Haha. I dont mind grounding myself to be part of the back 4 for our last match against 2024. Sorry sorry

2008-05-24T10:17:00.000-07:00

I'm back to blog. Lol. Friday and Saturday was pretty cool. But first,

David in heels, a dress and make-up. LOL. Sorry. It got me laughing for awhile. =)

Friday

Was playing soccer with my course mates. My contacts were supposed to come, but in the end, they were rushing assignments. zZz. Ah well. Tried to invite for CYL, but they were busy also. Sadded. Nvm. Will continue to SOW and work on them.

Went home and went for supper. Reach home go online then rest... at 5am. LOL. I did have a good laugh and a good timing for sharing.

Saturday

Svc came. I guess it's amazing. Cos sometimes, I could never give lower than 70%, but I couldn't give above 90% even if my life depended on it. It's always somewhere between those 2 values. So, I made a stand. To go and try to give 100%, not with my effort, but with The Big Man up there. =)

Also, the sermon was pretty impactful. I guess what was more memorable was that, we're responsible for what we think about. Well, I'm responsible for what I think about. I am what I think. Haha. So Yea. I think of myself as Fernando Torres. Tml I'm gonna grab 4 goals. LOL.

No la. It means that my thoughts shape my character, not my abilities. =) If I continously think that I cant overcome a problem, fact is, I won't be. I already lost before the battle started. So yea, this point.

Aft svc, received a phone call from my dad. His ex-classmate is coming over to stay. So well, I've basically have 2 sleep on the sofa. Yea, it'll be nice. No air-con, no fan, no comfy bed. Given the recent weather, I'm sure it'll be cooling.....

What's wrong man?! Haha. Dont complain so much. Next time how 2 go NS n church planting? LOL. Sorry God.

FYI, my previous post may let ppl think I'm some lovesick guy. Fact is, I'm not. I can be emotionally driven at times, but deep down, I know what drives me. Lol. It's just that I'm sharing it out to show that I've the intention to overcome or I overcame it already. =)

And.... Lao Shi's bday is coming soon. OMG OMG OMG

2008-05-22T02:32:00.000-07:00

And if you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would hold your hand, and look in your eyes
And you know I'll nvr let u go

The Champions League Final 2008. A tale of two halves. The first half was dominated by Man Utd, and they took a deserved lead thru CR7. But Chelsea had a lucky break and drew level. The second half was a pale shawdow of the first, and when the full time whistle blew I went to sleep. Cant take it liao. Lol

This week, only had 2 face-face tutorials. And I skipped both. Lol. Due to watching the Final I overslept. Abit no discipline. Hahahaha. So much for doing stuff to please God. Gotta change in this.

Just went for a 1 hour lecture, which wasn't a waste of time cos around 10-30 marks are dependant on this lecture, but still, waste of time also. Also, went thru part of the project.... where some ppl got some formatting and minor problems, I managed to avoid this hole thanks to some extra help tt I got. =)

This week have been feeling pretty lazy, need to get up and move liao. Tml marks the end of a long school week, suprisingly, where I didnt study much. Hahaha. Shiok.

After lecture today, went to invite for Challenge Your Limits 2. Yes ppl, it's a challenge of your limits. Like duh. Also, errr, be prepared to do some shit and run your ass off for the whole event. It'll be a suprise if no1 complains of muscle aches. It'll prolly mean not trying hard enough. Lol.

Went to invite for CYL2. Well, there weren't many ppl. But still, gave it a try. Better than nothing yah. Managed to get a freshie's number =) hope to see him come down for CYL2.

On my way home, thought bout something. Heh.... maybe shouldn't be thinking bout this kinda things, but what the heck yah. Lol. I wish I knew better what I wanted. Hahah. Maybe then, I wouldn't be the way I are right now. It's like, maybe some1 pretty will attract me. But looks wont last. How bout some1 I'm comfortable with. Yea, there're tons of those out there. Hahah. Ah well... I guess that's where faith comes in.

2008-05-20T18:54:00.000-07:00

This morning I gave Jolene a wakeup call, I knew she was still asleep. Cos she's laughing and talking at the same time, which is creepy. LOL. Sleeptalking.

Went for Apel class today. Well, altho it was a waste of time watching the videos, I did learn and thought bout what was said. Being yourself. No point trying to be something or someone I'm not. Ppl can see thru fakeness, every1 can. So yea, try to be myself more. And maybe I'll stumble ppl. LOL.

Kinda disappointed today. Because of some responsibility issues. Not saying I'm the most responsible person on earth, but I expected more. Haha. Maybe I expect too much liao? Nah. I have high expectations, and I believe it's justified. Nvm. God understands my disappointment, and that's all that matters. =)

And I'm glad it's more or less resolved.

CG was pretty cool. Praise was..... hahaha. I decided to try something new for praise. Well, whether it went well or not, it's not for me to decide. But I guess it's really bout pleasing the One. For, I rescheduled my BTT for CG, and to my suprise, both of my frens who were supposed to take with me failed. Lol. We'll see each other again.

And yes, during CG, it was mentioned I've a baby bolster. I still have it with me, I do wash it, and yes, I could live w/o it, since I don't bring it to camps or anything. LOL

Hahahaha. And do drop me a comment if any1 is reading. I'm abit hmmm..... by how ppl would see me if they dont really know me very well, but just read my blog. Lol. Then I could prolly change what's in here. I do understand that there's such things as freedom of speech, but I don't think I wanna ruin the impression of me for other people. =)

I'm in a cross roads now. I guess, love is really different from what the world portrays it as. Some warm fuzzy feeling, where everything's good. Gosh, I must really be out of myself to do this, but I feel that I gotta dish out some tough love soon...

Hahahaha. I'm also thinking bout this, whether I've any power or influence over people. If so, sometimes I rather not have it. Since, well, I guess it could be misused without me actually knowing it. Hahah. I did a test, not sure if it's accurate, but it shows that I'm swinging towards the extreme end of being a manipulative person. So, I would rather not hold much power nor stay in the limelight, but rather, just be some1 whom God sees is enough. Dont really need ppl to see I guess. =)

2008-05-19T10:22:00.000-07:00

So was talking to Jolene ytd, but after awhile, her MSN got problem. So she decided to say goodbye in an interesting way.

Dedicated message. Lol

It was a nice time talking to her, and very nice of her to at least let me know. Lol. Until she decides to do the following....

SCARE ME LIKE SIAO SIA. LOL. I really tot it was real for a moment.

Jolene gloating over her scam. Lol. Sorry la. I gullible can. Ez 2 scam.

Abt the drama of ESS.

Thanks for the random talks and encouragement. Jiayou!! ^^

2008-05-18T08:10:00.000-07:00

Friday

Yea. Finally served my WOS with my SOC. Took awhile. Like hell like that. Altho I think I made a mistake or two, but nvm. It's already submitted. Nothing I can do bout it anyway.

CCN Day.... also known as Annonyance and Traffic Jam day. My class too lazy to set up booth la... lol. But my course did. Set up some Bubble Tea business. Guess it did quite well. Met one of my frens at his CCN booth.

Then at night, went for E-Trial BTT (Basic Theory Test). There're 2 trial tests involved. And since my fren told me they'll give answers at the end of the trial, I didnt really take it very seriously. So it was a touch-screen thing, poke the stylus onto the screen to select your answers.

I was choosing my answers, then the guy had to come up to me and lecture me bout "touching" instead of punching the screen. LOL... First test I got 68%, which is crap. So I decided to buck up on the next test. Did loads better, 86%. And well, while some of the qns were really common sense, some really need to know de. Like those policeman handsignals or smth.

But still, need 90% to past. Which means 5 qns wrong nia. But a big THANK YOU to those well-wishers for my BTT like Grace and my classmates Jackson, Irwin etc; and those who after reading this will wish me well for my BTT next Wed.

Sat

Long day n even longer post. Morning woke up early and after QT and washing up, went for SIP briefing. Damn sian. Dont know where 2 go. Some more resume and cover letter must be done soon. Guess experience in SLA wld help alot. Haha.

Well, suprisingly, for my course, there're 2 places for overseas attachment. And that's to our neighbours, Malaysia. LOL. Of all places, Malaysia. How to work there w/o knowing Bahasa Melayu?

So aft 2 hours of long and painful briefing, was finally free. Managed to talk to some of my contacts. They just finished some trial. Hmm, but not so good according to them. Wanted to invite them down for Imposter, but they had smth on. Sadded. But there's still more chances, I guess? Dont give up.

Aft tt went down for Street Invite. Wah, the sun was pretty hot. Wanna affirm ZY. Haha. Your courage inspires ppl. While I was still thinking, you went up and approach. That speaks volumes =)

So aft that, went to find some of Jenny's contacts at Monstercue. Filbert(spelling) and Joanna. Intro-ed myself abit, talk awhile then I left for Ushering. Haha.

Before we start, celebrated Gordon's 18th birthday. Happy birthday bro. You're of age now. =) Though u can be pretty pesky at times, your desire to serve really shines thru. Keep up the good job bro ^^

So aft changing and briefing, went to rest awhile since I had quite a day. So after chaining up some of the seats etc; I was talking to ppl. And this funny thing happened. And for some reason, the dresscode was hip-hop. o.O

Me: Hey Grace, your jacket quite hip eh?
Grace: Wow, thanks. Alot of ppl say my jacket not hip enough.
Me: Err..... that was meant to be sarcastic.
Grace: Wah thanks lor. You know I'm very slow one?
Me: I'm sorry I have such a lousy sense of sarcasm. Hahah

That earned me a jab at my stomach. But it means I havent suan ppl for very long liao. Which is good ok! ~.~

Then Ps Jasmine also came up to me and said tt my face condition improved alot. ^^ \/
Well, she asked me for the reason. I guess it's not really so much so better eating or hygeine habits, but of more exercise, more sleep, and more emotional stability. It works I guess for me.

So Imposter svc happened. The drama was damn funny. Some of them really can act. And the video sums it all up. I dont tink I'll get tired of seeing that video. More impactful is.... "BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!" XD

Birthday boy Gordon, Slow girl Grace, and Pika utility man Me. Lol

The team for that day =)

So after svc, went to Tau Huay. So since I had debrief and housekeeping, my unit left first. So aft that, I saw Xueting they all at PS there. So I followed them and talked to Xt awhile. And there's smth tt got me thinking bout myself. Haha. It's quite sensitive, but it's the epitomy of what I've learnt not too long ago.

So on our way there, I saw that Hui Juan aka Rayna was walking alone and pretty quiet. So went up and talked to her for awhile. So talk talk talk, came to this. ( Don't mind if I post this out)

R: Ehh you've eaten dinner already?
Me: Nope.

R: You wanna treat me for dinner?
Me: Give me 3 good reasons why I shld treat you.

R: First, I'm hungry.
Me: Yea. I'm hungry too. Why dont I treat myself instead? HAHA

R: Second, I don't need to spend more $$
Me: Yea. Why dont you treat me instead? I dont need to spend $$ also. HAHAHA

R: Thirdly, you're a guy and I'm a girl
Me: HAHAHAHA. (No ans for that)

So after that, I offered to treat her, but her and her only. Not cos of anything, cos I know that in this situations, ppl will announce to the whole world that one unlucky chap is treating when that unlucky chap only wanted to treat one person. XD

So aft tt when I offered, she declined the offer =.= But aft awhile, she accepted my treat. Haha. No cos of anyth, cos when I treat ppl, I dont need a reason why. Maybe out of love? Agape love.

Oh yea, before that, she was like murmuring that she's been staring at me for quite some time on Saturday. LOL. I did suggest that she has a thing for me, but nah, I dont tink so. It's just I'm too good not to take a second look at! ^^

So aft tau huay, went to Macs to wait for the damn bus.

Sunday

We're up against TAG Utd. Damn. The place is damn far. Woodlands. That match, started as a left-back. Overlapped on a few times, out of position quite alot of times. Basically, wasn't any good. Damn tiring also. The sun saps energy out fast. Lol.

As for the abovementioned part, I'm not taking my BTT anytime soon. Cos of God's plan? Lol. Well, the BTT clashed with my CG. My shepherd called me exactly at the time I just reached for my phone while I was at Woodlands Sec. Talked awhile then got this answer, "you go think about it yourself"

Damn sian of this sorta answers. Though it's good and shows my thinking n values, but I'm pretty lazy to think, esp after a match. Lol. Didnt take me long to come to a decision. Cos of priorities, values and motives. Like, I compared the value of going for BTT and going for CG, and also the reason why I wanted to go for any.

So, initially, I called a friend to help me cancel and reschedule. But, his modem is down and cant go online. Lol. Means I got around half an hour more to consider. But in the end, I called ZY and asked him to help me cancel and reschedule. It's now on the 5th of August. LOL. Still got long. But still, thanks to those well-wishers.

And, thanks alot bro for ur help =)

P.S: The Janelle smth smth is actually Pei Yi. LOL

2008-05-15T03:21:00.000-07:00

Today was a complete waste of time. Haha. For a module, I was supposed to go interview lawyers or smth. Supposed to have an Interview at 3pm and 430pm, but the 430pm interview is pushed forward till 4pm, so I didnt go for the 3pm one but the 4pm interview.

Now, the office is located at Shenton Way. Means must go all the way down to Tanjong Pagar. Now I won't mind if the person going with me is a pretty or cute girl. But I got none. I got a guy instead. Haha. Not that I mind that much.

The MRT station at Tanjong Pagar looks so familiar. So, me and my partner managed to locate the place and the office, and we were there at 3.50pm. Better to be early than be late. However, the lawyer is stuck in court and wont be available till 430pm. zZz

Now, that spells bad news. First of all, if the lawyer lost the case, of cause he would be in a bad mood. And who will he conveniently take it out on? Haha. Then so, we sat and waited at the office for some time.

A girl wld have been better to wait with than a guy
A girl wld have been better to get restless with than a guy
A girl wld have been better to get tired of waiting with than a guy

STOP! Lol. Doesn't sound right now. God works in funny ways eh? No pretty or cute girl, not even a girl. But a guy. Hoho

So wait until daybreak liao, then the lawyer was back. The first thing he did was to talk 2 his secetary while saying, " Sorry to keep you waiting." He didnt even bother to look at us sia. So dao.

Then aft tt, we proceeded with the Interview. All he said was, "I'm rushing off somewhere. I need more time to do this. Need to think over carefully. Why dont you leave it with me then come collect another day?"

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

That guy made us wait 45 mins for him, and then barely 2 mins we're done. He could have just told his secretary to inform us of this. Lol. What a complete waste of time.

Well, at least the trip back was pretty ok. Managed to talk awhile, as well as invite. So, not exactly a complete waste of time =)

Accountability for me hasn't always been that well. In fact, I nvr built up that habit in my life before. So, people who used to take care of me often have very little idea what I was doing. Haha. Cos I closed up like a clam like that.

But, slowly, I see the value of it. To have Godly people watch over your life. To get sound advice. Tho the results may not be immediate, the results will prove to be good. Now, what can be so bad abt that? It's ironic, that while I dont judge or condemn when my sheep account to me, I used to feel that I'll get judged and condemned if I say smth I did. Haha. Perceptions.

So yea, I'm opening up more now, and I see the value of that, and it feels better to let it out than to keep it inside. And to my ex-shepherd, I think you have to take alot from me. Sorry that I was such an asshole. Not that I dislike you or anyth. Still, thanks for watching over me.

2008-05-15T03:05:00.000-07:00

This post is for our dear brother, Foo Chit Ming, and his 19th birthday, which falls on May 14.

CM, I've known him for quite some time, going back to late 2006. When he first added me on MSN, I got talk to him for awhile. But in my heart, I was like, who's this random guy who's talking to me right now? Haha

But he's grown alot. And the nickname we've given him, is a testament of his skills that he possess. For example, Muthu and Oliver. Known for his ability to cook very nice curry and western cuisine. Esp the chicken he baked at my house the other time. It taste very good. Really.

Also, he's a brother who's trying to live the Word out in his life. Constantly trying to seek avenues for growth, and thinking bout how he can grow himself more to impact the people around him. Keep going bro!

Now's he's an aspiring shuffler and Thai boxer. Hard 2 imagine him doing Muay Thai. But I believe he can do it de. So,one day bewarre, in case he come and Ong Bak you. Lol

Happy 19th Birthday.

2008-05-11T09:32:00.000-07:00

Had a happening weekend. Quite a number of things happened.

Last Sat night, I did something which I don't think I did before. Or at least in my memory. I sent my sheep home. Lol. So we took a train down to Kovan, went to the 7-11 there, and was looking at the drinks they sold. So since we saw this Amsterdam brand beer was on offer, $3.95 for 500ml, so we decided to buy it. At first, I saw that it was only 4.8%, and to me it's kinda no kick. I wanted to go for the 11.4% one, LOL. But decided not to.

Thank heavens I did not. Well, on first sip, the beer tasted good. But after a few sips, it finally justified why it's on offer. The beer is very gassy, and when you drink it down, it turns to foam immediately. So basicallly what goes down into your stomach is... .... crap? Lol.

But lousy beer aside. Lester barely drank 30%, while I drank around 70%. Lucky I didnt get the 11.4% one, if not sure die. But it's pretty cool ytd. Though I had certain things in mind, I guess it was more of a fren-fren kinda talk? Yea. Instead of me asking the questions n stuff, he asked me instead. His turn to know more bout me. Lol.

Aft tt, I took a bus home. 20 mins ride from my place to his. That is discounting the traffic, but still fast.

So Sunday came...

Woke up freaking early to go to SP for the competition. So pulled myself up, and took an MRT down. Saw Vivian at the Pasir Ris platform. So we took a train down tgt and talked all the way to Dover. Didn't take more than an hour tho.

So, since I couldnt' get a team in time, I didnt bring any of my gear along. But who knew that 2 teams needed replacements? Lol. At first I didnt feel like playing cos no shoes n extra shirt, then there's a LONG trip back to Pasir Ris. But still, aft watching them play, I myself feel like playing. Borrowed KC's shoes and played for half a game. But besides being an over-enthusiatic player, didnt do anyth else. Sadded.

Aft that, I basically choked on H-TWO-O. Had it for breakfast and lunch. I did I drank at least 6-7 cans of it. Lol. But soon after, Pei Yi, a sister from SP, came with a packet of buns. It was basically a very retarded word play. But still, good for blogging. Lol. Feeling hungry, I said,

Me: Ehh what's tt you're eating?
PY: Some bread.
Me: Wah. Look very nice hor
PY: No la, not nice one. Red bean paste where got nice?
Me: Yea. But when you're hungry anything will taste nice.
PY: You mean those starving children in Africa?
Me: No la. Sometimes it can be ppl right in front of you too.

So after a few banters, she offered me a bun to eat. =) yea, tho it's not much, it's better than drinking H-Two-O for lunch.

Me: Wow, thanks
PY: Not I buy one, my CL buy de.
Me: No wonder so generous la.... *just kidding*

So continue to watch them play soccer as well as interact with the ppl there.

Then aft everything is over, I managed to get a chance to do some basic stuff with Colin, like passing and shooting. So aft tt, we took turns to be keeper and take a shot. And he said,

"Your shooting quite good what. You can place the ball pretty well."

Oh yea. If I was wearing a jersey with my name at the back, I'm sure I'll pat it a couple of times. Oh hell yea. XD

So aft tt, went to Kar Chun's hse. Had dinner near his house, then aft tt go to his hse. It's quite cool his room, there's a 12-inch LCD TV and SCV in his room. Which means he can watch football at the comfort of his bed. Wow. Next time I want my room to be like that too.

His bro(sorry didnt catch the name lol), came, and helped me to upgrade my PSP. And I managed to get it to 3.80 and put Patapon inside. Lol. Pata Pata Pata Pon. Aft tt, we talked awhile and watched football for awhile too. Then I left for home. Kc's a pretty good host, I shamelessly helped myself to 2 cans of drinks. One is a Sparkling H2O, OMG, and the other some sugar drink. But still, thank God for his hospitality.

If people already didn't know, I'm a thinker. Which means I think alot, like duh. This is smth I thank God for, because it has been like fire at times. It makes me reflect and see more clearly, but at times, it's the cause of sleepless nights too. By thinking too much and yet not wanting to clarify.

It has been fire once too many times, as I wld sometimes flip and turn on my bed, worrying bouth smth which I shouldn't be, or just bout stuff which I shouldn't think. I'm gonna guard this gift of mine, before it burns the whole forest down, and use it to shine a light instead.

Not gonna elaborate much on what's on my mind, but as long as God n my leaders know, that's enuf for me. To go and think abt. Lol

2008-05-09T07:34:00.000-07:00

Here's a photo of my shepherd.... who has to take alot from me. Haha. I guess it's pretty easy to say what I did, but to explain why I did something, I think that's the difficult part. The motive. I'm still trying to open up. =)

Damn sian. My contacts still not confirmed. I really, really hope they'll come this Sunday.

Have you ever played until u're feeling so tired, that no amount of sitting down can help unless you sleep?

Have you ever played until the aftermath makes you totally not hungry at all, despite not having anything? And it continued for hours.

Have you ever played until the lights at the Street Soccer Court are swicthed off?

Man, I did. Soccer from 2pm-9pm, until the lights closed. Lol. And today I tried the role of a lone striker. Well, most of the time, I was. It was quite a nice experience. I did score 4 goals during these period of time.

1st goal - The ball was swinging inside. It was waist high. Diving headers weren't really on my mind. Gave it a jump kick, and directed the ball to the far corner. No power, just the bounce and angle confused the keeper. =)

2nd n 3rd goal - It was a 7-a-side, with 2 goals scored for a team resulting in the opponents to be off and for the next team. It lasted but 10 mins. My friends did the work, laid the ball on a sliver platter for me. All I had to do was tap it in.

4th goal - Personally my favourite. Desperately looking for an equalizing goal. A good thru pass from who but Jay sliced the defence open, and I took a swing, and GOAL.

Let me do a sports commentary on the fourth goal

" It was a 3-2 situation, a counter attack. There was no real danger then. Jay saw the run of SuQuan and he put thru a perfectly timed and weighted ball. SuQuan ran on the blind side of the defence and towards goal. Kept his eye on the ball, and swung it in with his weaker left foot. The power of the shot caught the keeper out. If that was a good finish, it was an even better assist. Take a bow lads, you both deserved it."

Lol. I hope it's good. And No, I wasn't trying to boost my ego. There are different kinds of shooting that I know of.

- With power into either one of the top corners
- With power towards the near post
- Place it and hit across the face of goal
- Chip the keeper

Managed to try 2 out of the 4. Haha. Hopefully can try more. It's obvious, my goals came from good passes from others. If I could receive 5 of those in a match, I'm drooling at the prospect right now.

Next week there's 4 big days in a row, and the 3 are just preludes to it.

Monday: Normal day. Tutorial
Tues: Shiok. No sch, spend an hour or two to do Company Law. Then the rest can be used to study for my trial BTT and to meet ppl up for soccer.
Wed: Tutorial in the morning, CG in evening. Soccer is also possible. Lol

Thursday

Tutorial in the morning, meeting 2 lawyers for interview for the whole afternoon. Ka-ching. $30 earned in total.

Friday

E-trial BTT. Nita pass it, so can dont study for the actual BTT coming soon. Lol

Saturday - The BIGGEST ONE

ESS. Hope to have a visitor. Nono, I know I'll have one. Lol. By faith.

Sunday

Pikachu United v TAG United

Time and Venue to be announced

Heard they're a physical team, well, we can be physical too. Just keep ur studs and elbows facing the ground. Lol.

Pretty upbeat we can score 1 or 2. Just nita stick to a more attacking mindset.

SMS came on day

XXX: "Hi, this is XXX from TAG Utd.Sorry for late reply. Wld ur team be free to play on 18th May, Sunday?"

After asking awhile

Me:"Yea. Our butts are free for kicking on that day. Time and Venue you arrange can? Thanks."

YEA. Our butts are gonna go for a round of kicking. But let's not go down without a fight =)

Not sure what to do now, mayb blog hop. Lol.

Speaking of blog hopping, I'm sure Jolene of SP has hopped to mine, and is reading THIS MESSAGE right now XD

2008-05-06T10:57:00.000-07:00

Adapted from a book by John Ortberg, and edited. Lol

Accountability

It's a tool and gift we give to one another to try to realize the growth we could never know all by ourselves.

When Eve was tempted, she kept the serpent a secret. She did not discuss with Adam nor tell God. Likewise, I keep the serpent a secret so that the option of grabbing it may always be there for me.

I need to realise that I cant fight the war against the serpent alone.

The skeleton cant be kept in the closet forever. It will be found some day. But I hope it's found before my heart is harden.

Often, a myraid of guilt, fear, worry and shame gulfs me. But still, for my personal growth, it has to be done.

And oh boy, am I'm glad I did =)

2008-05-04T07:37:00.000-07:00

This 2 days were pretty good. On Sat, me an Benj went to meet Lester to come svc together. Haha. We went with him to collect his PSP at some ulu shopping center in Serangoon. There was this shop that still sells Gameboy Games o.O

So while we wait, we wrote our cards. And then we went svc together. Though we were late for the transfers meet, we were on time for svc. And we had a great time playing this stupid game called Patapon. LOL

Well, our CG has 2 new transfers. Dennis and Newell. Welcome brothers =) Hope to know the both of you more. Dont be afraid, I won't bite. Hah.

So aft PM, we went to watch Iron Man. 32 ppl in total, 8 from Bizart. Azri asked me to go Sentosa the next day. Was pretty unwilling as I wasn't the kinda guy who wld enjoy the beach and sea. Until Azri told me that is to go there and play soccer and Lennon and Benson are going.

My eyes sparkled immediatly when I heard both their names. HAHA. I told my shepherd and my leader where I'm gonna go the next day( I'm a open guy k. XD)

Iron Man was pretty ok. Well, I kinda liked it. Though I'm not sure if it's as good as BenCH says. Enjoyed it still tho. Aft the movie, Zhi Wei dropped his wallet. Went with him to retrieve it. Thank God the guy cleaning up the cinema found it. =) First time I saw him so nervous also.

Aft tt went for supper with Justin, David, Jorris, James, Donald, Azri, Kenneth. Went to the prata shop at Bencoolen there. Didn't order anything there as I wasn't really feeling very hungry. Lol. Well, I guess, if I put down some personal prejudices and look at things objectively, things ain't as bad as it seems.

Sunday, went to Sentosa with Lennon, Kenneth, Benson, Ke Han and Ke Han's friend, Gerald. Went to Siloso beach there. Quite alot of funny incidents.

First of all, someone said that, Singaporean girls wld only wear bikini tops but not the bottoms while ang mohs will wear both the top and the bottom. Well, I didn't really go and take note, mayb abit bah. Just abit. Serious. Lol

Then so we went to play soccer. Haha. Running on the beach is worse than running on the field for some reason. It wears ppl out easily.

So for the second match, I was in the opposing team as Lennon. And I scored while he was the last man. HAH. 2-0 in our favour. Guess is he pang chance also. Supposed to play until 2 goals then the losing team go jump into the sea. In the end, the extend it to 3 goals, and we lose 3-2. Lol. Due to my inability to run anymore on the sand. ... .... ....

So after that, we rest and crapped around. Then another guy was talking about how some ladies in bikinis playing volleyball tried to seduce us, but we got some spiritual power to block it out or smth. Lol. I was between like, "Lol", and "Leave me out of this". Yea. Quan's too good for girls in bikinis on the beach XD

So after tt we went Carl's Jr at Vivo to eat. Had a great time of sharing and fellowship with them. Too bad no photos. Lennon shld have the photos. Lots of funny things happen. But still, I enjoyed my time with the 5 brothers. =)

Some videos and things to take note

This is me trying to dribble past my marker(Ke Han). It was bad. Ke Han pang chance alot.

First of all, at the start, I tried to push the ball to the left. Ke Han is not some one who's afriad of tackling, but he didn't. He let me pass. So in an actual match, I should be on the floor at the 10 seconds mark.

Also, aft tt, I lost control of the ball because the sand was pretty uneven. And my specs were flying off. In an actual match, the opponent wld already have stole the ball away and launched a counter attack. Hope to get this right soon.

This is my running up position when I kick. I didnt actually kick, but from what I see, only my leg is moving. Nita swing my whole body weight with it. Get this right soon too.

Next 3 matches, I dont see what we're gonna play for. So if there's anything anyone wld like to attempt to do, pls do so. No harm trying. Lol

2008-04-29T07:32:00.000-07:00

Dont be shocked... It's not abstract art, nor is it photoshopped. It's real. Lol. It's my sheep Lester and him squeezing into a cabinet in Design school and trying to sleep.

If you tot this is nothing, look below. There's enough room for 10+ ppl. Lol.

Really thankful for his life. I really believe that he can be greatly used. I just hope that I'm more ready to impart to him this time. Won't stop interceding for you bro.

As I said, I learnt a great life lesson ytd. And I learnt it while watching a cartoon. Lol. There're many nice ones around, but the one I watched is Teen Titans. A brief sypnosis of the story.

Robin, one of the Teen Titans, was battling with a villian who is a kung-fu expert. When he realised that he couldn't beat him, he decided to learn from The True Master.

As Robin approached the mountain, he followed the instructions of an old lady and disarmed all his weapons and gadgets. He went thru the trials and testings with much difficulty without his gadgets, while the villian just tailed and followed him.

Finally, on the last stretch of the journey, the villian knocked Robin out easily as he was armed and more energetic. Robin fell to the ground defeated, and he was pretty disheartened as he spent all his energy passing the trials while the villian just took the easy way out and knocked him down.

Just when he wanted to give up, the old lady approached him and said, There are two ways to reach the top. The easy way and the right way. There will always be people who take the easy way, but that shouldn't stop us from taking the right way.

With this, Robin got up, knocked the villian down, and kicked him off the mountain. As the villian fell out the mountain top, Robin said, " There's always an easy way and hard way to climb the mountain. As for you who took the easy way up, you're taking the hard way down.

Cool eh? If you catch no ball, then nvm lol

Today met up with Joycelyn too. I picked up smth close to me. Haha. Thanks. But it's time to focus on what's impt instead of trival stuff like this. ^^

2008-04-27T09:24:00.000-07:00

Some randoms

This is the ice-cream I had wif Lester at Haagen Daaz. It's really good man. Let's go back there someday yah? XD

This looks very small, actually it's 1 litre. Lol. Best part, it's on the house. No thanks to me, but to Nel. Haha. 1 litre of beer.

First week of school completed for me. I didnt skip any lectures... yet. I hope I wont skip anyth for the rest of the sem. Though it seems impossible with MLOCT lecture being 3 hours break away from my previous lesson. Lol.

I'm also charged with planning birthday for some Ushers for the month of May and/maybe June with another Usher. Lol. It's written all over the Usher schedule. I'm SURE those May/June birthday babies WON'T suspect a thing. >.<

2008-04-23T09:18:00.000-07:00

Yesterday night, as I went online, I had smth to ask Joycelyn. So I saw her nick, and I decided to talk to her. Apparently, her MSN nick and personal msg is no difference. But, her email displayed is Jen's email.

So I decided that it was nothing more than a server error, then I saw Joycelyn's email, but it was Jen's MSN nick and personal msg. So I was pretty puzzled but I thought it was all a scam.

Turns out that they actually switched MSN nicks, personal msg, and display pics. But aft they switched back, Jen forgotten to switch her personal msg, so there were 2 similar ones. And I really believed that my eyes was playing tricks on me. So I decided to screen shot it, to prove I'm right.

And I only found out I'm right tonight.

If you catch no ball, it means that Jen and Joycelyn decided to switch MSN nicks, and ytd I talk to Jen thinking it was Joycelyn. And they colluded to scam me by saying my eyes got problem. And to think I believed them. zZz

Well it was convincing cos Jen copied and paste Joycelyn's MSN replies to me, so I tot it was for real. Guess I'm too trusting already. One's my shepherd and the other my ex-shepherd. LOL. @_@

As said, here's the pics for Joycelyn's birthday party

Yes, for the above 2 pics, is ppl sabo me de. "Deny Yourself!" They screamed. lol

Well, we got a watch for Joycelyn's birthday. And so after presenting, sum1 by the name of Kar Chun actually shouted, " SuQuan help her wear!" And so, yea, this was it. =)

Last but not least, HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY GLENN

2008-04-23T02:00:00.000-07:00

Yay Happy Birthday Glenn Samson Ong Ming Chyan. It's been a pleasure knowing you. I've known you since 2005, when we were still in East D. =) It's been a long journey huh, I guess?

Last time we were not that close, but recently, I've been talking more to you. Really glad to see you still serving, and deep down I know you still have your dreams and visions which you've yet to fulfill, but I believe it'll come to pass one day.

It's sad that you've been called to National Service and have less time to hang out, but I guess it's not bout the amt of time spent, it's how the time is spent? Haha. Too bad you weren't in the squad against NYP when we faced them, dragged off already, but maybe we will face each other again?

happy 21st birthday bro. Welcome to adulthood and the world of taxes.

2008-04-19T13:41:00.000-07:00

The below part is dedicated to my shepherd, Joycelyn, for her 20th birthday :D

When I first got to know that I'm gonna be under her, I was pretty nervous. For a moment of time, I felt like I was going to jail cos she's gonna control my life tightly. Haha.

In fact, my impression of her is that she doesn't really like guys and that, she's very fierce and she wld have me for a meal if she got up the wrong side of bed :X

So during our first meetup, I did what I do best. Show what I was feeling thru my body language. I literally clamed up. In the end, it made her tense for a moment of time. But after awhile, it was pretty alright.

But I guess, what really touched me, is that she makes the effort to get to know me better. There was this once, I had smth I wanna share. But she was occupied. So I just put it aside to another time. But who knew she actually called me and clarified it wif me. o.O, and it took like 100 mins but she didn't mind. =D

Also, she's willing to speak the truth to me. It didnt make much sense then, but, come to think of it, it's actually true. lol. Very patient also. Last Tues I actually knocked out for a second cos I was too tired. I tot I wld be in for a scolding. But in the end, she just laughed it off. Haha

What made her special was that, I felt more like a friend around her instead of a subordinate. I don't find myself having much difficulty opening up. Having said that, it doesn't mean I'll take my shepherd for granted. Haha.

Anw, really appreciate you very, very much.

Pictures of the birthday will be out soon.

Happy birthday to Glenn too. A post dedicated to you will be out soon. Haha.

Got a good feeling bout tml. Instead of playing against Team Evo, will be playing alongside some of them in a friendly match! Lol. Woots~

2008-04-18T11:41:00.000-07:00

Finally! The 4 days of evax is done. Managed to break 20 :D

Met up with Lester today. Had a great time with him, managed to talk to him and know him more. And we had Hagen Daaz (spelling), ice cream. Pictures to be posted soon. Lol. Abit tired to post it now.

The Vanilla was recommended by the waiter as being the most famous flavour. So we gave it a shot. And well, it was pretty good and pretty unique. Taste nth like those 50cents ice cream u find on the streets, cant be named. In case they sue me. Hahaha

And altho the serving size was pathetic, the flavour is really different. It's not milk and sugar, that's for sure. You wont get sick even if u had a tub of it. It has a very strong flavour, and very unique. Tho I couldn't taste some very well as the combination dont go together. Lol.

Going to sleep liao. zZz

2008-04-16T07:18:00.000-07:00

Gelare that I had with Joycelyn during shepherding last Tuesday at Suntec City.

The 3 scoops were, Cappucino, Swiss Chocolate Caramel and Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough. The 3 flavours were pretty good. But one was too sweet. I imagined that I swallowed a chunck of maple syrup when I ate it. That day was pretty whacked for me as 11am feels alot more like 3pm to me. Lol.

These few days abit tiring for me. But it's for a eternal cause. Been waking up at 630am every day like tt, then now at 10pm, it seems so 2am to me. But all out for Him~

There's still Thurs and Friday, and I have only 8 ppl. Got 2 days to try and hit 20. 60% more. =)

2008-04-14T06:29:00.000-07:00

Yay. Pikachu finally got a point, a hard fought 3-3 draw against Venture 14. It's good, for we've drawn a point against a team from the top half of the table. It's not ez, but Pikachu did it =D

Today had dinner with my dad's ex-classmates during his university days o.O Was supposed to have crab, but because of the message that literally came a min too late, I missed it as I left before the crab.

As fate would have known in, I dont need to show up for the meeting anymore, and I'm on the bus already.

WHAT

THE

=.=

Hahas. There'll be more chances to have crab, I hope.

2008-04-11T07:31:00.000-07:00

Something funny happened today. AFter I played soccer with the guys today, wanted to change my pants. But lazy to go toilet and change la, since so far, so I decided to change there. Nobody mah. Or so I tot

Then after I changed, I turned around and saw two girls walking from behind me. Means they saw my undies n sexy butt. Haha. Can go buy 4D liao.

2008-04-09T08:45:00.000-07:00

Today was my first shepherding session with my new shepherd, KarChun. Lol. We did nth but play Dota for the whole 2-3 hours. Nice way to get to know more bout each other eh?

Actually, the abovementioned part is all false. Kar Chun is not my shepherd. Lol. I just love to irritate him.

Today was my first shepherding session with my new shepherd, Joycelyn. Now this one is not fake. I must admit, I was pretty nervous for quite some time. Didn't know what to expect. Weird heh?

I'm not such a good actor, and so my body language screams "TENSE!!!!" all over, from my face to my constant fidgeting. In the end she felt tense as well becos of me. Lol. But it was Ok after awhile.

I didn't really have any expectations of our first meetup, but I guess it good after all. I guess after awhile, I didn't really have much problems opening up, I guess? Hah. Thanks Joycelyn, u're really sum1 different, in a good way =D

2008-04-04T08:02:00.000-07:00

Today went for the drama celebration. Yay, Ben and Jerrys. Shiok. Too bad I couldn't really finish it, too sweet for me already.

Found a lao ki siao, and there's 3 abundant ppl too. Lol

2008-03-31T08:59:00.000-07:00

HEY PEOPLE. I'm back from Thailand! Woots. Actually no, I'm back from Golden Mile Complex, which is like no difference from Thailand la. Lol.

Pictures taken during Saturday.

This is taken after Theme Night. Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the prettiest of them all? XD

Ok, I feel like there's ALOT of people who have blogged about Arete, so I feel that there's a need for me to do so too.

That was just random. I guess I do want to share my experiences and what I learnt during camp.

First off, the Talent night. All I can say is.... I swear, (not supposed to use this word, but it's the motive I'm using it for), God is really behind everything. Everything was done pretty last min, from the props to the plot. I guess, I didnt expect to win anything even tho we did ^^ \/, so thank God for it.

The fellowship I had there was good too. Got to spend time with the guys, esp those whom are not so connected. Didn't managed to spend time with my alternative CG aka my careGROUP! (Yes, the group must be emphasised with a louder voice and a more sarcastic tone)

The food was........ it leaves alot more to be desired. Haha. The KFC was good tho. But then, it's KFC, how bad can it be? Lol. But the KFC managed to create an insider joke, YEA!

But the most important thing, what I learnt there, was priceless. It was immerse. Really.

One of the things I learnt is, the difference between a child and an adult, and why a child can do so little. The child is immature, not able to control his emotions and temper, lack discernment and judgment, always out seeking for fun, dependant on others or independant and rebellious.

And all this seems so much like me. Haha

There's alot more, but abit lazy to say. Lol. Sorry la.

2008-03-26T09:26:00.000-07:00

Woots! Our cg has a new Group-Tau =)))

JOYCELYN!!!

It's not the first time we've seeing each other, and well, we(the guys) used to crash her CG a couple of times. But it's different this time. Still, it's not tt different too. So let's grow and run tgt =)))

Side note: Liverpool gonna face Arsenal 3 games in 1 week. They're prolly gonna walk in with the "We're the Kings Of Europe" mentality and get smacked. Lol. I hope not tho.

Randoms. Lol. Going to sleep liao. Tml still nita wake up damn early. No more Dota tonight

2008-03-25T11:03:00.001-07:00

人动球不动, 球动被 POSSESS!

Lol. Had a very good laugh today. Damn, haven't laughed like that in a few years. It's kinda bad, but super funny. XD

Some photos of the food I had in Malaysia

The beef ramen here is good. Now, when you're comparing stuff to the Beef Ramen in the place we call $ aka S11, anything would taste good. But the beef here is tenderly marinated and the taste of the beef is inside the soup. Unlike the $ one, which is plain soup and rubber beef. Lol.

6 donuts for 9.50RM, pretty reasonable price. Cant help but take one before taking a pic. But after eating one, I finally know why it's so cheap. Dude, it's donuts man. Why're trying to be healthy? Where's the oil and sugar? Lol

Chicken from the chicken rice. Cost 3Rm, quite tasty and good proportion. The only draw back is, the stall is a road side one and it's regular customers are the flies. So yeah.

I did had more food than this, but I didnt take down all. Lazy la. Lol

2008-03-23T07:26:00.000-07:00

Back from my trip to Msia. Was kinda good, did lotsa eating. Lol.

But missed Easter svc. =(

Update more next time.

2008-03-17T06:05:00.001-07:00

Got my results back, and well, I did better than expected. Didn't fail anything at all. =)

Brian McBride. Woots!

2008-03-09T09:37:00.000-07:00

I'm back from my run, as I said I would. Lol.

Aft DMM, went down to Siglap Sec. By the time I reached there, match's over, ppl washing up, and well, I guess everyone was feeling down. Who wouldn't be? It's like, we've just taken a few steps back, just when we tot we were making progress.

But still, thank God for you Xueting, Pei Xin, Hui Juan, Serene and Liping. You peeps came down and support, and it rained some more. Lol. When I was there, could see that some of you were drenched. Thanks for the support. Altho I wasn't on the pitch, if there's a chance that I would play and u peeps were there, I hope to repay it with a performance.

When I first joined, I didn't expect myself to want to be part of the team so badly. Even when we're on the wrong end on the scoreline, I still believed that it's not the end. I still believe it is not.

I didnt see the match, nor was I there. So I wouldn't comment on who played well and who needs to improve. But just cause I wasn't there, doesn't mean I would absolve myself from blame. I would force my way into match fitness if necessary. Even if my body doesn't react to it, I'll make sure my mind and willpower is up to it.

But one thing that's glaring. Not to be pessimistic and dampen spirits, but we lost 4 games already, out of 10 games. It would be OK if the 4 teams we lost too are all the good teams, but it's not. We lost to the bottom half of the League. Out of those remaining 6 games, 2 of them are against Team Evo and FC 2024, and I'm not even sure if I would be playing in those 2 fixtues or not. Lol.

I mean, if our next match was against either of them, they'll prolly go, "This is a team that is 12 points below us, have a goal difference of >30 between us. Let's go out there and blitz them."

I can't see where our first point would come from. Lol.

Argh. Don't focus on them now. Hope to be able to gain a significant increase in match fitness soon, then there's probably alot more that I can do. Lol.

Someone mentioned quitting. In Dota, ppl laugh at feeders but hate quitters. Similarly, I rather get laughed at than risk getting barred from Season 2, if there's a Season 2? Lol.

2008-03-08T18:35:00.000-08:00

Feeling kinda groggy right now. Lol. The first thing I did when I woke up was to brush my teeth and go for a run. Shld have had smth first. Now feeling kinda.... shitty.

Been running for the 3rd day straight already ^^ Mayb when I get back at night I'll go for a round or two.

Any1 looking for a midfielder? I'm willing to try =)

2008-03-02T07:10:00.000-08:00

Today was quite tiring for me, reached home at around 6am in the morning after a long bus trip, and a even lomger wait for the bus to come. My mind was like wandering off, had a hard time catching it back since I was pretty zonked. Went to sleep after bathing. Woke up at 10.45am to get ready for water bap. Well, not me going to bap, but others who are baptising.

So reached PS and had lunch, then after that, went to YWCA. Then, after that,support Zhi Wei and Mei Yi's decision to obey God. I appluad u all. =)

So went to Manhattan for dinner over basketball. Had Fish and Chips there. Was discussing bout some stuff. Well, basically, nothing eventful happened to me up till then.

But, mayb smth eventful did happen. I saw someone whom I wasn't expecting to see or really wanted to see. Well, basically, she was at the entrance, while I was sitting just next to the entrance, we stared at each other for around 20 secs, before she broke into a smille and waved and I reciprocated.

Aft that, I turned away and looked at the guys. Mayb not so much of the guys, but the mirror which was facing the entrance. (If you go Manhattan's before you should know) Made sure that she went inside and far inside, before ok, can turn back liao. Lol.

Well, all I can say is, Thanks for the fact that you did not pretend that you don't know me. I would've done it if I saw you first. Lol. Too bad I didn't get to say bye though. Oh well. I cherish the relationship that I have with God right now, glad to see you're doing fine too.

2008-03-01T20:05:00.001-08:00

Friday, play lots of soccer. In the morning went to play with my course mates, play for like 2 and a half hours like that. Lol. Lots of running, cos it's basically 4 a side, so loads of running and possession involved.

Aft that, went to play with Pikachu United. Tweaked a few things here and there, and hopefully, we'll be ready. The ref always say, "After 3-4 matches you'll be fine" Pls, the next match will be our 4th match already. If we approach the 4th match with the advice the ref gave us, we'll prolly be screwed. Lol.

Suprisingly, for all that running, it's my arm that's sore. But should be ok in awhile.

Then Sat night had a great night out. Enjoyed the talking n fellowship. =)

2008-02-24T03:11:00.000-08:00

What a horrific challenge. Poor guy.It'll be a miracle if he could even walk properly after this. =(

God bless him a speedy recovery. He's needed for Croatia's Euro Championship as well as needed to torment and show the world how lousy England actually is for the World Cup 2010 qualifiers.

Speaking of which, it's 24th Feb. Which is like, almost 2 months since X'mas has past. And I'm still alive and kicking, and still serving. Thank God for that =))

2008-02-19T09:38:00.000-08:00

Ah, the age-old dilema comes in. Whether we should identify with a person and give some personal advice or we should use the WOG to advice.

I'm nt saying that the WOG shouldn't be used, it should. In fact, it should be the grounds of whatever advice we're giving. But, sometimes I consider this, that a person has heard the plain and direct WOG, and all that is needed is a personal story behind it for it to click.

Ok, in case ppl catch no ball to what I'm saying. Lemme give an example, let's say A is facing spiritual dryness, and then he asked around and got like the verse "Seek and you'll find", so he turns to you.

Will you:

A) Use another Bible verse, or,

B) Share personal exp bout overcoming spiritual dryness

I tend to swing more to B, I did ask myself why before, well, there're several reasons which I cld think of, but mostly is cos, I myself like to hear live testimonies.

So to the ppl that I shared my exp to w/o really expounding on the WOG, if there's any misinterpretations, feel free to quote my name and ask. Haha. Aft all, that's how I learn ain't it?

2008-02-18T01:24:00.000-08:00

Damn sian. Someone pls explain to me, how we went from scoreless during half time and end up losing 3-0. That was a abject second half performance. But I'm still confident, we can still climb up the table.

Exams coming soon. 3 papers. Hope I can score well for this exam.

2008-02-13T09:26:00.000-08:00

This past few days have been kinda like that for me. Don't really know how to describe. I didn't go and update my Livejournal, cos, well, this few days is thinking and evaluating n stuffs for me.

Was thinking bout past traumatic experiences and lifting them up to God, what I cant let go, I decided to loosen it up. For I know it'll hinder my growth. Things which I don't wanna think abt when I wake up first thing in the morning.

For one, I cant stand being stabbed by ppl, whether indirectly or from the back. I used to have this best fren, he was the one who brought me to church. Well, why did I say used to? Cos he left.

I'm sad that he left, but what's more memorable is the manner which you did. I'm sorry, I didn't know that you're not supposed to reciprocate trust. That I told you what's on my mind, but you didn't say back. So much for being best frens. Since you're the one who always claim that you've known me for 10++ years blah blah blah

In every sense of the word, I don't think very highly of him right now. Sometimes, when ppl ask me to invite him for some church events, I often wish to tell them that it's utterly ridiculous that when he breaks the trust, I have to be the one who patch it back. It's like.... wtf? Ah well, as the old Chinese saying goes: "If I dont go to Hell, who will?" So fair enough, I'll just do it. Trying my best to expand my love for ppl.

Another bunch of ppl, I cant put the appropriate word to label you all, so I'll just keep it as here. I didn't know what I did to warrant your attitude towards me like that, but thanks for giving me the death sentence.

No really, not trying to be sarcastic. But aft the fiasco, I put to death some of my ol' attitudes.

For example, one of you wrote a hate post on your blog bout me before. It's like wtf, since we barely known each other for a month, and there you are slating me off already, like you understand me very well. I did write one back to retaliate before, but, it's kinda childish. So if you were to write more about me, I'll just think like, why do I even bother, forget bout it, and move on.

Now I know why I don't really ostracise ppl. Cos I myself kena before. Not openly, but anyone can sense it. There was this gathering which I myself skipped, for like the first time, cos I know I will kena there what. Why bother going?

I seriously feel like killing someone there, but I didn't. Cos all eyes were on me, which made it pretty easy for ppl to push the blame to that one person who sticks out like a sore thumb. After all, if smth goes wrong, it's definatly not your fault right? Lol.

I admit, I was pretty loser back then. But this bunch of ppl didn't really help. They just made matters worse. How I know I was a loser in the past? I just do. So much for fresh blood, feels more like HIV-infected to me. Lol

Ah but now, it's different. Even if you were to make me feel unwelcome, I'll still show up, cos who's there for you anw? Haha. I know why I'm doing what I'm doing.

I'm trying to change now, for the better. To grow myself. I'm stopping for nothing. Take my word for it.

And if any1 has anyth to comment, pls use the taggie.It's there for a purpose. LOl.

2008-02-09T15:04:00.000-08:00

It's 7 in the morning, and I just reached home. Pardon me if any words which shouldn't appear comes out, becos I'm currently kinda brain dead to give a rat's ass bout censorship law right now.

Just back from an overnight mahjong at Jacob's place, which the usual. Man, this is the God knows how many nights in a row I'm seeing them. I lost count. Honestly. It's kinda ok really, to spend time with ppl. However, it's kinda screwed when you know that you've achieved nothing this week.

Which equates to... 24x7 hours, 168 hours wasted. SHIT.

I can't believe I'm saying this, and I reiterate, I can't believe I'm saying this, but, I see the need to plan right now. Or at least set objectives. Know what I wanna achieve this week. Hey, this week's CNY, so no objectives needed right? Time wasted can't be chased back, so lesson learnt.

At my place, my fridge got kinda screwy. According to one of my relatives, it's not exactly spoilt, just that the gas ran out. Just nita refill it can already. So right now, only the freezer is working. The rest of the components seem to be working since the light is on, but it's not.

So my perishables, basically, perished...Lol.

Like the fridge, I'm feeling kinda shitty right now. Like, I seem to be functioning properly, but, seriously, only like a portion of my brain is active during this period. Maybe it's due to the late nights I'm having, since before today, the earliest time I reached home was 4am. Yeah. Give an take a couple of mins.

Halfway during the mahjong while shuffling the tiles, I just froze for a second. Not cos I was sleeping like how the rest thought I was, but cos the realisation came that I nita spend more time with God. Not reach home at 4am and just fall dead on my bed or smth. Man, I dont mind doing with a Sabbath right now. Lol.

In fact, I think is spend some time with God. Screwed.

So aft the mahjong, I did some evaluation. On priorties. So I've say I put God as my first, and well,

1)God
2)Friends
3)Ministry
4)Studies
5)Family
6)Self-Mgnt

This is not the ideal, but I evaluate what I've been doing recently and came out with this. Yah, friends are impt. That shouldn't be the way, but the way I see it, it is. Damn, self-mgnt last. I asked myself, so if I negelect self-mgnt, wouldn't I self-destruct soon?

Oh wait, I'm already feeling the after effects. Lol.

Damn. No worries, I'm kinda slow in realising certain things, but I'll change fast.

Today's svc talks about a topic which is often talked about like John 3:16. It's just comes as a timely reminder. When Ps Jeff ask us to set some criteria, I didn't.
Well, let's just say there're a couple of reasons.

1) It'll change with time
2) I rather think on how to grow than this

Seriously, I think it'll change when I grow up, so setting it later ain't such a bad idea? Somemore, if I do set my criteria, I'll measure ppl according to it. So really, what for? Lol.

Focus on what's in front of me now, and think bout this later. I haven't even got a career yet, so how to stablise it? Lol. So yah. No bothers to waste time.

2008-02-04T09:22:00.000-08:00

Finally! My part of the project is done! All this time of slogging it through, finally completed. My other journal hasn't been updated for sometime. It doesnt mean that for this period of time, my brain went into a period of inactivity. It just means that I'm really caught up with my stuffs, and well, my faithfulness was tested. I must say, I did fail quite badly. But still, I pray for His forgiveness and then take it again!

Today went to Bugis with Glenn, Stewart n Xiuzhen. Look for CNY stuffs. Saw a couple of familiar faces there. Jenny, who WAS supposed to be studying (jiayou wor), her youngest brother, and Si Hua, usher from NYC. All were there to do some last min shopping. Me? I was just looking around, whether to buy or not is another issue. Lol.

Well, fyi, I've already bought more than enough already. Now is just time to see if I'm lazy or not to wear. I've bought:

- 9 pieces of tee shirts
- 1 long sleeve shirt
- 2 berms
- 2 jeans
- 1 cardigan
- 1 pair of shoes

So yeah, I don't think more mindless sprees are needed. As of right now, I'm feeling pretty tempted right now. Not sure why, maybe it's because of my own insecurities, maybe it's because of expectations not met previously, maybe it's that tinge of jealousy. But whatever it is, I'm not going to dwell on it. I'm not. Try me.

2008-02-02T11:45:00.000-08:00

Went back to Youth svc today since I got reunion dinner at night. When I reached there, well, to me there's actually no difference. Mayb just the sudden influx of the 小妹妹

During worship, I was reminded that ppl can provide spiritual covering to a extent, but only God can give covering to the full. Was kinda refreshed as I was pretty sleepy, since I woke up pretty early today.

At reunion dinner, really felt the teaching being put to life. My uncle, for some goddamn reason, decide to poke fun of me. Keep on calling me "Amen" and why I dont do the catholic sign thingy before I eat.

Hell, I really feel like smacking him. First of all, I do have a proper name. My parents gave me one. And it's definatly not "Amen."

Second, I do pray before I eat. There's no need for me to do the Catholic "Touch my head, heart n chest" sign before I eat. The food is not my God. Lol.

But still, I'm nt sure if it's the wise thing to do, but I just kept quiet and continued eating, and er, don't give a damn to what he said. Yeah.

Well, it's not because I didn't want to clear any misunderstandings or smth. At that point of time, if I really did talk back, I'll lose more than my temper. Trust me. When there's one fine day, I'll prolly explain more in depth. In gentleness. Not to try and flaunt my prowess in sarcasm as well as a lack of respect.

2008-02-01T07:36:00.000-08:00

Alright, so my CNY shopping has begun, and is almost done I guess. Lol. Save for the few extra things here n there.

I just tapered my jeans and got one new pair of skinny jeans! Woohoo. Lol. Walked past those red skinny pants a couple of times, and nothing, and I repeat nothing, would make me wanna get a pair of those. I'm not even sure if they're meant for human wear in the first place. Lol.

And, according to Benj, I've got a new*ahem* CG! Lol. Well, I don't. I still haven't forgotten bout my CG. And that's a fact k. Was telling my fren bout tapered jeans, and she was asking me if I want to be a mat or not.

Well, I just need to smoke, wear my cap in a mat-unique fashion and mayb I'll look like one soon. Oh ya, can't forget mentioning blasting lousy music as loud as I can thru my phone. Soon you'll see me dancing to the beat of Umbrella or Smack That.

Yeah, I can barely imagine, dancing like I kena scalded by hot water like that. Lol

2008-01-29T04:38:00.000-08:00

Another Tuesday, another self-declared off-day. Lol.

Dropped by JB again, this time with my classmates. We ended lesson at 1045am and made our way to JB lor. Not much crowd there, passed customs pretty fast. Reached there around 12pm. And went to MacDonalds for lunch first. Yes, I had beef Prosperity Burger when I'm in JB. Lol.

Went to walk around awhile, saw a few things that caught my eye. I guess I need a new wallet, mayb a pair of jeans, some shoes, some shirts and that's about it.

But one thing that caught my eye. Secret Recipe there. The things there, cost the same amount as compared to Spore, but it's only in Ringgit. Meaning, you could get a piece of cake for only around 6RM, and a chicken chop for 13RM. That is of cos, before the service tax and GST.

Speaking of which, since when did Msia have service charge? zZz. But still, I seriously dont mind going back to JB soon and trying out all the Secret Recipe cakes. Lol.

And oh ya, forgot to get stuff for others on my way back. Sorry! Haha. Will rmb to grab some stuff on my way back next time. Well, at least remind me. ^^

2008-01-27T08:36:00.000-08:00

Was kinda disappointed with today, the match. The scoreline was pretty respectable, it wasn't like the previous one, and Ps Ben won't have a reason to poke fun of us again. Lol.

Managed to found my photos all the way from my baby days till now. I think. Haha. Not much time to update, cos tml got OB presentation. zZz.

2008-01-24T20:48:00.000-08:00

Thurs was pretty alright. More or less completed the script for French speaking test. Then after that when I reached home, I went for a run. To Pasir Ris Park and feel the breeze, and back.

I think God really has to be God to take my nonsense. As I was telling Jen, feeling kinda sian this few days. Cos evry1 around me seems to have something on during Valentine's Day. All excitment and happy n stuufs. Well, I was SUPPOSED to have something on too, but some ppl thought otherwise. So yeah.

Note: This is not a sign of me going crazy over getting a Valentine's date or smth. I'm not going to start barking around like some mad dog. The way I see it, if I wanna go out on a date, there's only 1 person I'll go with? Lol.

Ah well. Got a few ideas in mind.

1) Grab a few close frens n go out? ( Which would 99.9% mean Stewart if he's free)
2) Go out with my Unit?
3) Stay at home and study for exams la.

So, hmm. If I have smth on Valentine's, and you can't contact me, just spam Stewart's phone and see if I'm with him or not. Lol.

Was thinking bout this, does ministry make me "unprofessional" or not? Cos my fren heard me bitch about freeloaders for project mates, and he cant see why I'm complaining yet not giving them what they deserve, or do not deserve.

Means that I'll not espionage ppl for peer appraisal. Lol.

I dont know, sometimes, it's just compassion bah. That I won't be so mean as to sabotage frens. Ah well. One of them did well for mid-sem, so I shouldn't pull her grade down by a few notches, while one of them failed mid-sem, so he needs the marks badly too.

So, I'll just be Mr. Nice this time then. Lol

2008-01-23T10:08:00.000-08:00

Ok, here's a treat to all readers of my blog. Lol. A past photo of yours sincerly here.

Like I said, everyone was a center-parting before. Esp in secondary school. Lol.

No prices for guessing which one am I. Laugh at it all you want. I dont really get affected. Lol. Part of my unglam past. The other ppl in the photo remains much unchanged, except maybe for my elder bro on the right who's currently in NS now.

But, still, I think I've changed much.

Prolly u cant see my face much here. But at least look at the shirt I'm in. I think I look dashing in it. Serious. Well, if any out there haven't seen my face in recent times, well, you can always check me up. Haha.

2008-01-20T05:45:00.000-08:00

Sat was svc, and well, it was Pastor Shirley's first time preaching. But I didn't manage to catch the whole thing because I sent Lester off to the MRT station, and then ok, I took my time back =X

But for the time I was there to catch the sermon, I must say she's pretty good.

Sunday was Combined Team Rally. Well, Ps Ben set out the direction for 2008, and I must say, I'm pretty clear of what 2008 lies ahead. And this word "journey" really stuck with me. Well, on a journey, sometimes there may be storms and fatigue may set in. But whatever it is, I'm gonna continue and not stop.

I was also reminded of this, that on a journey, intention don't determine your destination, but your decisions does. For example, I may intend to eat Western food but in the end, I see a long queue and go for chicken rice instead. So where I am in the end is different from where I wanted to be. There's many choices to be made, but I'm ready.

Ps Ben also seem pretty glad to announce that a team got whipped 9-0. Haha. Yeah, I was on the wrong side of the scoreline. Don't matter. The next match will be better. I hope.

Then had DMM later. Was a teaching from the recent LC, on loyalty. It's applicable, since it basically means that even 1% of disloyalty could mean that we end up like Judas. Well, truth be told, I'm not like say 100% surrended, but I'll be ready.

2008-01-17T08:11:00.000-08:00

Lol. Last Wed was a 4 man CG. Which was not too far back, 2 days ago. No prizes for guessing who was there correctly. Lol. Well, I've to say it was pretty good. I'm starting to get used to the lack of guitar in the CG. even though it made me appreciate having a guitarist even more now.

Had a change of programm, it was just some heartfelt sharing. We had a few laughs here and there, but deep down, I cld barely afford a smile. I was kinda in a slump. It's kinda funny really, that I had no idea why I was feeling this way, I just was. Lol.

But I guess this is a way of training bah. To learn to take feedback, and to continue improving.

Gosh, Family Law is killing me. The text book is thicker, badder, drier than my Bible. I'm dead serious. But what to do? Consider this as part of training my patience and perseverance bah. I mean, I can relinquish all my work and pass it to some1 else bah, but it won't be a nice thing to do ain't it?

I seriously have no mood to go plough thru the books and cases, but what to do? Damn the long judgments. Make it short n sweet can liao mah. zzz. It's not like we're using archaic English right now.

BizArt guys. We really need to grow more. We may be small now, but doesn't mean we'll be small forever. I haven't told you all this yet, but, let's not forget the joy of serving God and the joy of breakthrus etc;

The reason why bad things seem to go on a streak, it's because we fail to see our victories. Or maybe we have forgotten what it takes to have a breakthru with God. Dont forgo what is eternal for the temporal.

In every sense of this passage, I know that I may be the one who fluctuates the most. But, I desire to see breakthrus. Let's run together ok? Make this run count.

2008-01-15T04:48:00.000-08:00

Ah. Just back from a run. I just realised that proper cooldown is impt too. Cos my legs sore like mad sia. Must be from the game last Sunday. zZz. But it's kinda cool. I just ran and completed my target distance, and when I stopped, the pain just dropped like a bombshell and I was limping around for the next few mins. Lol.

Well, it's been quite a slack past few weeks for me. Somehow projects don't really seem to be piling up yet, but there's a submission next Friday as well as an Accounting test on the same day. Routine life of a poly student. Can't wait to graduate.

Time seems to fly. January's gonna end soon. Very soon going to be CNY, Valentine's day, exams, holidays, Year 3. In fact, already started thinking on my next life station already.

But whatever it is, I know that God will be there in my next life station. I prolly dont deserve this honour, but I guess that's what God is all about, ain't it? Finally see the value of appreciating what you have, cos God can take it back as and when He wants, so learn to give thanks for everything. ^^

Sometimes, God has to put me thru tough times before I learn, so that I won't forget. Haha. Really, I need to learn to obey without being spanked. The beauty of the finished clay, I'm ready.

2008-01-13T05:03:00.000-08:00

There's alot of things I wanna blog out, but it'll be too long to read I suppose. So I think I'll post my learnings into the other blog.

8-0. We lost to the Indonesian district team. Sian. We need to buck up for the next 9-10 matches. Seriously. The game was held at Clementi there, I'm kinda shagged from the travelling just now. Butt rot in the MRT sia. Lol. The only positive that I tink I can draw out would be that I managed to last for the whole match. Other than that, I need to get boots. Or smth that won't make me slip off so easily.

Really, I probably shouldn't say this out or smth, and that person prolly wont see the point of this. But I really cant help taking a swipe at it. Someone told me that while I was in Youth I was actually part of a "Blacklist", cool eh?

Think smth like Need For Speed: Most Wanted. Blacklist for the most notorious racers, who committed an obscene amount of offences and avoiding arrest at the same time.

Honestly, at that time I had a list of choice words to rebutt, the unspeakable and the unbloggable. Cos I really couldn't recall what I did that warranted the blacklist. But, just now, God just told me smth bout this, that whatever standard of measure you use to judge others, the same measure will be used back on you.

Prolly I'm too judgmental, so now I'm being judged over one or a couple of incidents. I'll grow from this.

I saw this Mat(Malay beng), he was dressed all like a biker. With spiked leather jacket, leather boots, all sorts of weird chains, and the biker hairstyle. And guess what, he was taking a bus. Same bus as me some more. LOL. It's like, u dress like a biker but take a bus. Why dont I dress as a doctor but be a road sweeper?

Ok, being judgmental again.

Also on the bus, I saw smth that made me felt a myraid of emotions. Mayb cos I was kinda zonked(it's 4:33 am), but still I asked God to give me smth else to focus on. And God gave me MCR.......

No la, he just gave me rest. And afer that, I'm alright already. Thanks. Seriously needed that to stop my mind from wandering off, esp off from You.

2008-01-11T01:47:00.000-08:00

Ah well, I've changed my wishlist already. Since I doubt Liverpool would ever win the title with the nimrod for a manager and those bunch of dross who call themselves footballers.

In IT lab now, where it's much more quieter, and then any1 can log in to an IT com also. Hehe. Got a new place to do research liao.

Was reading at Teenage mag with Try, Azri and Joycelyn just now. It's super OMG la, the content was a total waste of money, but it's the content that makes it nice. Like got one girl who claimed that she transformed from a jovial nerd to Gothic EMO and feels miserable. Of cos you do! Which Emo feels cheerful? Lol.

And also, the Teenage Pals section is actually just a place where desperate ppl go and hope that some girl would reply. Well, if the girl has to resort to a mag to look for a stead, she can't be better off too.

Best part, got some 31 yr old guy wrote in to try and find a gf. What a pedophile!

Having said all that, it's not like I never went thru this period before. C'mon. All guys were despo once. Once. Maybe some even now, but not me now. Haha. I can attest to that.

Anw, if I were to write in, I'll prolly write in smth that will pwn their English. Like say, Without you my life is like a broken pencil. It's pointless.

Yeah, visit my journal. http://quanwifgod.livejournal.com

2008-01-09T08:36:00.000-08:00

Well, today marks the return of the guys CG. Felt what we've done was rather good, considering that we haven't had one in a few months. This time, it's really a sign for things to come. I'm sure of it.

Today was a first for me, as well as many of the other guys. We had CG without praise, cos we didn't have a guitarist. Lol. As for worship, we went without the guitar. ^.^

There were quite alot of positives drawn, like, we should chose songs that are easier to sing next time, and that, we can still get ministered without the guitar. I guess we really showcased our singing prowess.(Or lackof)

In the end, what I feared happened. Someone laughed during worship, and evry1 followed suit. Some tried 2 fight it back, while I just kneeled down and laugh. Sorry God. lol.

But I thank God for these, that He took control of the teaching and He took control of the CG, which ran smoothly, which without Him, would never had happened. ^^

2008-01-07T03:25:00.000-08:00

I was affirmed last Sunday, which is technically yesterday. I'm feeling kinda glad, cos I know it's not me, it's Him which is in me that caused it.

I hope to change more, not for affirmations or pride, but cause I want the glory to be shined thru me.

Fool me once, shame on you,
Fool me twice, shame on me.
Fool me thrice, kill me pls. (lol)

2008-01-03T08:03:00.000-08:00

Finally, Conveyancing role play is complete! Coupled with the fact that I do not have lab tml, it means that I'm free all the way until 2pm. Finally have time to catch up with some much-needed rest.

Went to visit Ben's CG during Wednesday. Well, I wasn't the only visitor there. Glenn was there, and James and Chen Wei joined for awhile before leaving. During the worship, I felt this image in my mind. I have no idea how to express it in words, so I drew it out, albeit poorly done, but later I took a step of faith to express it.

It's amazing really, I nearly choked on the words. Coupled with the fact that I hadn't been exercising this for quite some time, it's quite an achievment. Really. I know it's not from me but from God.

Ppl might dismiss it for some hysteria, but I know deep in my heart that it's more real than the ground I stand on. My gratefulness to God, I really don't know where to start, but just, with a simple Thank You. Really.

Next wk Thurs to Sat there'll be Open House. This is a good time to expand the contact pool. Really wanna grab hold of this chance. Talk is cheap I know, so I hope my actions prove otherwise. Pls don't say that you're not sure of Open House. It even appeared on TV Mobile for Christ's sake!

As much as I wish to talk bout events and events only, I often find myself going much more than that. I guess that's cause a Christian life is more than just events. If it wasn't, I'll probably be sick of it quite long ago. I'm not really afraid of being known by ppl, since I hope that what they see here will be what they see in real life too.

Good night ppl ^^

First post of 2008

2007-12-31T22:18:00.001-08:00

Pop went the poppers, as we ushered in the year of 2008. Ppl were smiling and congratulating each other for taking one step closer to their graves. Ok, that was pretty bad. Congratulating each other for making it to see the next sunrise.

Honestly, alot of things went thru my mind then. Memories of 2007, and how bad it has been. In a nutshell, circumstances and feelings dictated much of my life in 2007. Wasn't really doing much, just wasting my time away. Lo and behold, one yr has passed. Took me quite long to realise this, but I'm still far from being a man of God. But I'm aspiring to reach there, believe me.

Feburary would mark my 3rd year in church. Honestly, I feel like I'm just a 1 yr old baby. In fact, I've seen ppl who're less than a year in church but still growing alot better than I am. 1 year repeated 3 times? Highly possible.

Learning is a lifelong process. That it doesn't stop when I reach a certain lvl. Instead, the more I grow, the more I should be growing. I should seriously drill this fact into my thick skull.

During the countdown, I'm not sure if watching ppl run around alone is better or running around in a grp having company with you. It's like comparing the lesser of two evils. But still, being Station Master and being alone gave me loads of time to think bout my resolutions.

1) Giving more to God

There's nvr too much we can give, only too little right? Let not my giving be stained with unwillingness.

2) Mature and Steady

Too much fluctuating in my walk. One fine day I could be in church, and the next I would feel like backing out. Read the Bible but dont wanna live by it. End of such moments.

3) Continue Learning

Learn from books, other ppl, sermons etc; God gave me a brain for a reason, and that is to learn.

4) Do smth significant before I graduate

I often tot that JC ministry was less than 2 years and was a very short period of time. Poly ministry is no better. Time flies. I'm gonna take up arms soon. Consider this my final rally cry.

5) Pro-activeness

Well, happenings fall from the sky every other day, don't they? So I should probably just sit in my seat and wait for things to happen. Not.

6) Speech

I would win hands down the title of "Shoot Your Mouth Off Without Thinking". I hope I would be dethroned and be the last of the line.

I think there're more, just that I haven't thought of it to be more specific yet. When I did, I'll write it down more.

2007-12-28T01:13:00.000-08:00

Some of the gifts I received for X'mas:

Some calender figurine for X'mas

Both of these shirts were from Jen and Joycelyn. I tried it out le, just the right size. Thanks!

And of cos, not forgetting those who wrote me a card, including those whom I dont really know well like Hui Ling and Cedric, thanks a million ^^

Last but not least, I received a present which I expected to get but not so soon, freedom. Not of my soul. I wasn't a Christmas baby, as in, I didn'r receive salvation during X'mas. But, this freedom, is freedom of my emotions.

Now for some time, we were neither here nor there, somewhere along the middle. But now, I'm here and she's there. and I'm cool with that. And to cap it all off, it happened on X'mas Eve. What a gift!

Seriously, I'm cool with that. The reason why I didn't end it all sooner was well, I didn't want to be the one who break my promises. If anyone can rmb, during the 15th December performance, the guy " promised to love the girl blah blah blah", yeah, I said smth like that. OMG, how corny can I get? Haha.

But I really thank God for God, becos, w/o Him, I would have seriously crumbled. Like I think I would either cry and beg over it, or I would curse and swear to everyone around me. I would have done that, seriously. God prevented any of this from happening, and He allowed me to deal with it rationally. I guess, with that 2-3 weeks of buffer time, I did really think thru and get myself ready for it.

Now I know better than to let my guard down, to leave my heart wide open. To not have a Godly conviction n vision, to not walk closely with God. I'm slowly learning, but surely not going to slow down. Well, having said that, it would be unfair to conclude that all these happened becos I wasn't guarding myself enough. You're quite a charming person yourself. =)

So now, I'm going to learn more, grow in God more.

No more:
- Tossing in my bed with your name in my head
- Having stupid thoughts of us being tgt
- Fluctuating in my walk with God
- Seeking aft fun, hell no.
- Being insecure n having stupid thoughts.

As usual, I rather you pray for me than to leave a stupid comment like you know me very well. You could leave a tagg, however, you must let me turn on the part of me that gives a shit. Good day ppl ^^

2007-12-23T06:18:00.000-08:00

Alright, this is a major part of 2007. I already sorta mapped out defining events of 2007, but haven't really thought out the resolutions for 2008. So here's the big shit of 2007. It's a Down for me, however, since I can face it and learn from it, I would take this as a Up. Haha.

Maybe some of you would not know, but Accounting was one of my worst subjects. I scored well in Accounting, but, I just dont get it and it made watching paint dry look interesting. I hadn't really paid full attn in tutorials nor really put in the effort to do it. However, there was this particular tutorial which I did my tutorial, and not only tt, the tutor told me exclusively that I could actually get an A and not to let the A slip out of my hands.

So.... is this the big shit? Of cos not. The thing is, this msg I saw made me wanna study harder aft I said I'll try to stay awake for lesson.

"Cannot try... You still say you want to study hard... You dont study hard then how have bright future... No bright future how to yang me in 13 years time..."

HAHAHA. Someone actually thought that I had the potential to achieve something in my life, get a stable job, and allow me to provide for a comfy life. 2 ppl actually thought they had found their life partners and gonna get married 13 years later. HAHAHA. I had no idea what was going thru your mind when you said this, however, does it matter?

I mean, what went thru my mind was enormous. I was grinning from tooth to tooth after I saw this. It actually kept that smile in my face for quite long. Sorry ppl, but Quan can actually be a childish f*** sometimes. Well, if I could believe in this, no telling what else I might not believe in right?

For a period of time, I've fallen head over heels for her. I really thought that we could grow up and be with each other. HAHAHA. I laugh at my own folly. When she left, she didn't just leave, with her went my passion, drive, spirit. I mean, everything was about her at that point of time, when she left, I was just left an empty shell.

I didnt do things very xtreme then. As in, I didn't skip svc cos I didnt want to. However, I skipped CG once before becos of her. zZz. zZz. zZz. OMG. So stupid.

But really. I honestly thought that God would hate me for throwing Him away just like that, that I side-tracked so easily. God however, proved me wrong by being there for me, and that everytime I feel down, I just pray and my burdens would be lifted. Seriously need to repent. =)

However, it wasn't w/o it's benefits. For once, I hate fun, or anything that has only "feel-good" factors and no purpose. With her, everything we did was fun to me. That I now find that, fun is a very stupid need to meet and I can now seat thru things that isin't fun.

Then, I once promised before that I wont look at other girls again. Not that kinda use eyeball and look de, but it's those guys kinda look, if you catch my drift. And I now dont look already. Waste of time.

Also, I'm now asking God for a new passion n spirit of servanthood. Not one that will be lost just like this, but one that'll truly last. For His glory. One that'll make me driven.

Well, everything has repurcussions. Sometimes, I will get bouts of nostalgia and think of crazy stuff. So, if ppl out there are truly concern, instead of leaving a brainless tagg, why not pray that I'll be more secure in God? It'll be of more help. Thanks.... =)

I'm not typing this to stumble ppl, but just a part of my life you know? Oh yea. Actually, 99.99% of this is fake. It's just my emo side trying to garner more attn and I exaggerate stuffs. You got it man.

2007-12-20T09:51:00.000-08:00

1. Last person you had a deep and
meaningful conversation with?
- On Sat with Stewart, James n Xiuzhen I guess

2. What does the 10th message in your inbox say?
- A fren offering to pei me talk if I'm bored. Haha.

4. Pick 1 person you trust with your life?
- That's hard. Does it include God? Well, I would say either Stewart or Jen? I mean, my buddy or my leader won't do anything to harm me right? Those not mentioned doesn't mean I don't trust you, it's too hard to chose already.

5. what was the last thing you ate?
- Bread with peanut butter

6. What was the last thing you highlighted?
- Mindmap for conveyancing

7. Who is the last baby that you held?
- Adults wont trust me with their babies.

8. Do you know of any twins with rhyming names?
- No.

9. Are you ticklish?
- Yes.

10. Have you ever worn a crown?
- Nah.

11. Last time you've seen fireworks?
- Can't rmb.

12. Who is the last person that left you a text message?
- Stewart

13. Do you have a black dog?
- Don't have dogs

14. Do you have a little black dress?
- What????

15. What colour is your underwear right now?
- Dark blue

16. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
- Chit Meng

18. Are you missing someone?
- Most prob.

19. Reason behind why you last cried?
- MYOB.

20. How much cash do you have on you?
- $1.80.

25. How many rolls of film do you need toet developed?
none?

26. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a major regret which would you choose?
- Gosh. I would very much love to right a wrong, but God made it a wrong for a reason. So yeah, the former.

27. What’s on your mind right now?
- X'mas, n stuff which I wouldn't disclose.

28. Do you have one deep dark secret?
- yeah.

29. Wouldn't you rather be having sex right now?
- Err.... no?

30. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had?
- o.O

31. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for?
- Staying out late, that was in 2002!

33. Do you have any strange phobias?
- Err. Of death?

35. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?
- Married.

36. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
- My brother used 2 trick me that if I ate smth, I would die. =.=

37.When you are old enough are you getting any tattoos?
- Nvr tot of getting any.

38. Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet?
- I would, but they may not know God, which is not fair.

39. Do you crack your knuckles?
- If I knew how to.

40. What's one thing that can always be found in your refrigerator?
- Chilli sauce.

41. What colour are your bed sheets?
- Don't notice,

42. How many kids do you plan having?
- 2?

43. If you could kiss anyone who would it be?
- MYOB.

44. How would you rather die?
- At a 3rd world country, where I could prolly share with my dying breath.

45. Have you ever been in love?
- yeah

46. When is the last time you went out of the state?
- Oct/Nov?

47. Have you ever had a true one-night stand?
- No

48. what would you spend a million dollars on?
- Lots of things.

49. We are all human; do you think we judge someone for a past indiscretion?
- We probably could. But it would be measured to us in the same way, no?

50.Generally, in life, what makes you happy?
- Lots of things.

2007-12-18T13:11:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder why God created me like that. Nono, I'm not blaming God or angry with Him or smth, just a thought. That I've ever imagined life w/o God but not life w/o ppl.

Well, some ppl only. Some I feel I could do without. But alas, God placed some ppl here n there 2 make sure that I can learn some valuable lessons, like patience, speaking the truth in love, loving the unlovable etc; you know who you guys are =p

As 2007 draws to a close and 2008 approaches, I think I'm gg to start 2 think back on 2007 n reflect on it, prolly think bout resolutions for 2008. As the old wives tales goes, it's not auspicious to carry debts over to the new year. Similarly, issues left unresolved should be resolved before 2008 for better fengshui.

So.... those crappy lil promises, are they still valid?

2007-12-15T20:11:00.001-08:00

Sat was ESS. So as some of my contacts weren't coming down, I decided to go n serve. Wah. The svc was pretty unique, cos it started at 730pm. So the whole svc went on. And my oh my, who knew ZY could act so well? Haha. But I'm really proud of him. =D

Ok, the fun part. Cos I haven't had anything yet, so the rest of the unit went ahead first while I grab something to eat. In the end, I was grabbed by Lennon cos they need ppl 2 help clear up the deco. We thought it was as easy as dumping everything into the rubbish chute, until the Cuppage management told us that it's not allowed, so we had to take everything down O.O

So aft we took everything down, they actually wanted 2 shift the deco back 2 Nexus. Gosh, gimme a chance, and I'll probably scream at the management as well as the person who suggested that we'll shift everything back to Nexus. Imagine, you shift quite a load down from lvl 5 to lvl 1, then dump in the rubbish collection point. Then after that you gotta go inside the rubbish collection point, take everything out, and shift back to lvl 5. Wow.

In the end, we decided 2 break the deco, which is made mostly from styrofoam, into smaller pieces, dump into those black rubbish bags, then inside the rubbish collection point. So I had a good time karate-chopping the styrofoam, it was kinda fun. But by the time we're done, it was 11+ already, and I still haven't had anyth yet.

Which by then, me and Stewart and Xiuzhen waited for Joleen to go eat together, then we took 36. Which on the bus, we missed our stop and went back to Marine Parade =.=
The time was 12.08am. Thank God there's still a bus back to the city area, 36. Haha.

We then met up with James at Makansutra, and James' member, Daniel, joined us for dinner also. After Joleen left, me, Stewart, Xiuzhen, James n Daniel decided to go and be gay man. We sat at the Singapore River there and shared. Daniel left at around 2 plus, while we continue to sit there n talk. Was really thankful, cos I've learnt smth (I hope), as well as they didn't try to hold back or be pretencious. Instead, we did open up our lives, and so we really shared. We left around 4.15am like that, which by then, there's no 7N alrdy, Gotta take NR7.

Then after I reached home at 515am, my shit-for-brains brother had alrdy locked the ledge. So I have to stay outside at the bench outside my house and play PSP until my parents wake up and open the door for me. Lol.

2007-12-12T20:33:00.000-08:00

Finally, left one paper only. Got smth interesting to share. It was Accounting paper today, the catch is, I forgot to bring my calculator. That's like going out w/o your EZ-Link card or smth. Some more there was only like 5 mins before reading time.

So I panicked and started to make a dash towards my lecturer's office. Yes, my life depended on it. So in the end, I saw this kind lecturer who lent me her calculator, so I didn't have much difficulty finishing the paper ~.~

Went for the Youth camp thingy on Tues night. Really enjoyed myself. Was hesitating whether I should go or not, but I went in the end. One thing that struck me was, the sappy "I love you & let's hug each other" part.

Cos they were singing like, I love this family of God, and after that, they went around hugging each other like tml's the end of the world or smth. I then realised, how much, I've changed. I found this to be GAY. Gosh. Spare me pls. *No offence to the ppl who hugged*

Yes, I do appreciate this family God has placed me in. I mean, honestly, how bad can this family be? This family spurs ppl on to greater heights. The ppl inside nvr doubted each other. I *****, if any of us is in trouble and needs help, this family would sacrifice just about anything to help.

And it also makes me wonder how I almost gave it all up. Note the word: "Almost". Haha. I'm glad I didn't. And oh, even if I haven't grown in maturity, at least I know I've grown in the gift of skeptism.

2007-12-10T00:03:00.000-08:00

Sunday Times: What will it take for Miss Singapore to win Miss Universe?

Ans: Foreign Talent.

HAHA. Was laughing my ass off when I saw this answer. Anw, been walking around recently. Alrdy got a few items in mind for X'mas gifts. But some spoilers bah. Most ppl will receive encouragment cards from me I guess. Lol.

Gotta go back to study OB liao.

2007-12-07T09:41:00.000-08:00

Next wk is term test liao... STill got alot of revision to do zzz. Seriously, sch is just like a rat race. Slack, projects, study, slack. zzz

Just received my phone bill.

500 mins of talktime.

I wont rly want to say what my mum thought of the bill. Just that, my allowance would be cut if the next month's bill is like THAT.

Now, was it really worth it?

Wake up le lah! God is calling

2007-12-05T16:51:00.000-08:00

Gosh, I'm in sch right now, as I'm blogging this. Didn't really catch much sleep for the whole night. Probably about 2 hours or so. No, not cos I'm emo-ing, c'mon. I'm way too smart to do THAT.

Just that the weather was freaking cold, the air was pretty stuffy and I had a blocked nose. Made it really unbearable to sleep. Panadol lost it's power. Yes, in a desperate attempt to sleep, I tried to take Panadol to induce sleep. Didn't work at all. Hah.

I leave my post up to the interpretations of others. Nah, I dont tink my readers are born with half a brain. Go think what u like.

2007-12-03T11:56:00.000-08:00

Would it have been better if I didnt make that call?

Would it have been better if we didn't go out??

Would it have been better if I had stopped at there???

Feeling kinda emo right now.

According to some ppl's definition of emo,

Emo ppl are just ppl who have no problems but pretend they have one.

So yeah.

Cant you see that this post is my desperate cry for attn?

Haha

2007-12-01T18:24:00.000-08:00

I think we've gone back to reality.

That's good. Stay there.

Dont think of gg back to fantasy.

Cos even if you do, I won't be there.

Same goes for me too.

Thanks for everything, really.

Just that it was a pretty bad timing only.

The dream ends now.

2007-11-28T09:26:00.000-08:00

"God is always for us. But are we for him?"

What a nice rhetoric qns for my homecoming. Back to Ben's Cg. Lol. It's been quite some time. This speaks volumes to me. I dont tink anyone knows this, but I'm known as "the moaner" to some of my frens. Becos I'm super good at whining and moaning.

Just ask BenCh during Arise. XD

I keep on complaning, complaning, complaining. Yes. Typical Singaporean. Dont give me the shit about me being a guy and moaning should be smth I shouldn't do. Why not I say, girls shouldn't be running around cos it's not very ladylike. Instead they should all be at home learning to do chores and cooking. Sheesh.

Sometimes, when things dont go my way. I complain & bitch. What about times when we want God to move in our lives but it seems like He doesn't? Does that mean that God is not moving? Means that God is not for me? That I should complain and bitch until God corrects His "mistake"? Hmm.

I dont think I need to elaborate more. God himself knows if you're reading and thinking bout this. Haha.

2007-11-26T07:55:00.000-08:00

"Where have you been all my life?"

In case some of you don't know this, here's a warning esp to guys....

Guard your heart, esp at night.

Basically, the typical guy's defences rises with the sun. Aft the sun sets, the guy's defences becomes something like what Derby would put out in the BPL.

It is then damn easy for any shit to come in, to which the typical guy would just crumble and die. And the next morning, evrything will seem like a hangover and the guy wonders if it was all just a dream.

And no, dont try to act gung-ho behind the monitor screen. Every guy would have wished for some understanding person to call when they're deeply troubled and burdened. And yes, typically, the person would be a girl. If it was a guy, most guys wouldn't even bother. At least I know I won't. =/

Don't you find that most meaningful conversations happen at night?

During the day, we're all so caught up in our busy-ness to even care bout sharing our feelings.

But once night, we would all stare at the empty sky and emo. Start to hope for someone there.

I know I have.

So guard yourselves, so as not to say stupid stuff and have hangovers.

2007-11-26T05:12:00.000-08:00

What If God Is One OF Us - Joan Osborne

If God had a name, what would it be
And would you call it to His face
If you were faced with Him in all his glory
What would you ask if you had just one question

And yeah yeah God is great
Yeah yeah God is good
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home

If God had a face what would it look like
And would you want to see
If seeing meant that you would have to believe
In things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints
And all the prophets

And yeah yeah God is great
Yeah yeah God is good
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home

If I had one qns 2 ask God, probably it'll be either

1) Do You hate me for what I've done and said?
2) Why do You keep forgiving?
3) Can I have things my way for once? etc;

What bout you? =D

2007-11-24T23:08:00.000-08:00

Sat went for ARISE, which was basically a trustfall event. It looks easy, but when you are actually doing it, it's a different thing. Seriously. Falling from on top of a table is er... not very fun. Lol.

Went to svc by coach, wah. Traffic jam. Svc started late. STart at around 6.05 like that. Cos half the congregation not there mah. Lol.

On a lighter note, something I saw in NYP. Knock yourselves out...

I say, NYP has a hell lot of disabled toilets. There's even a female and male disabled toilet -.-